Use this as a signal, people...

Flirting is getting your admiration, attention, appreciation and approval ENs met...which means neither you, HRL, nor your H, are meeting these needs within your marriage.

Stranger approval is weak compared to the potency of spousal approval, attention, admiration and appreciation...because strangers, you don't know...you get that clean slate impression, make up the rest, which heightens your thrill from flirting.

Fantasy stuff. Not real.

When your spouse flirts with you, he knows you, thoroughly...no clean slate, abject reality...intense ENs met when you do this with each other...get into it...helps to clean the slate of built up resentment, disappointment, anger, frustration, entitlement...and it injects respect...treating each other as clean slates, discovering each other today, brand new (and you both are), is like a power punch of thrill...

Take it as a signal to enhance your marriage...keep within marital boundaries and thrive.

And HFL, if you relive that thrill of flirting with a married man in your head to feel it again...be sure to include you going up to his wife and telling her a blow by blow, word for word, verbal and visual recount of what you did with her husband...that usually helps end the fantasy. And then, tell your husband.


I wish you were friends with my wife!