My W and I would be interested to hear from someone who has attended any of the these weekend seminars. What are they all about? Is it just a re-hash of the principles we already have in the books? What was the best part or most informative or helpful? What about the follow up work? Were you able to keep on task to complete it and what did it teach you?
We would like to know since we have considered attending one in the future but are unsure of the usefullness as it relates to all the books and material we have already gone through.
Thanks for any help!
brw [img]images/icons/wink.gif" border="0[/img]

Hi,<p>H and I went, and yes, it was really kind of a rehash, but good nonetheless. It focused us on our marriage which is a good thing. It also brought up some of the pain too...which was hard. <p>When we got home, couldn't get H to do the assignments, so no, we didn't keep up.<p>There is a MB cruise coming up....that sounds like way more fun!!!

<p>[ May 14, 2002: Message edited by: sadprincess ]</p>

Brw,
My H and I went. It was a total rehash of the books BUT even though I didnt get any new information it seemed to reinforce principles to my H, like POJA, radical honesty.......
The best thing we got from the seminar was to see other NORMAL (and some not so) people going through (I assume) the same things we were.
We had a game "guess the cat" we tried to guess which spouse was the cheater, it lightened things up for us (I know we are bad).
It really made my H (WS) feel more at ease talking about the A, you know not such an ogre. There were a lot of christian successful people there so he felt like if they could mess up too, then he made a mistake and wasnt just a horrible person.
There was not any sharing of storys or breakdown groups or talking outloud. We only really talked to other couples on our breaks and at lunch. I kept wondering if I "knew" any of these people from this board.
It was at a very nice hotel, and that was nice too.
I have heard a lot of people talk about retrouville with good success. They do have break down groups and talking - My H would have hated that.
Good Luck
Oh ya, no we havent done the homework.
L

Starfish and Sadprincess..............
Would you have done it knowing what you know now about it? We are concerned that for the cost plus the lodging ,etc that the money could go to something more helpful.....like the cruise!
Anyway, I am very supportive of this program but if it's not going to introduce something new or new ways of approaching it then I'm not sure what it would serve other than a brief vacation. The follow up is a concern also. We have done a few of the excercises but not all and it is the same with other books. I'll bump this to get any other op's. Thanks for replying!
brw [img]images/icons/wink.gif" border="0[/img]

How do you get information on the cruise? I didn't see anything about it under the Seminars section. When is it? What cruise line?

I started a thread on this same question about 3-4 months ago. All of the responses were that it was good, but definitely a lecture type rehash of the books. The MB'ers here who went did not think that it was worth the $. (close to 1,OOO with all expenses)<p>I took their advice and cancelled our reservations. Of course any amount of $ would be worth "magically" changing our situation, but we decided to do the reading at home and indulge ourselves a little on other things.<p>Hope this helps, Ladysing

Just wanted to throw my two cents in here....<p>My H and I have attended on of these weekends. I would agree with most here that they are a lot of rehash from the books. Actually, "a lot" is an understatement. <p>What was really good about the weekend for us was just getting away from "normal" life. No kids, no family. Just us. It gave us a lot of time to just spend time together with no interruptions. <p>As for the homework, we are behind. But they also tell you to work at your own speed. I don't know that we have learned anything specifically from doing the individual assignments. But I have found that some of the assignments have opened up lines of communication and made it easier to talk sometimes.

<blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by sadprincess:
<strong> I have heard a lot of people talk about retrouville with good success. They do have break down groups and talking - My H would have hated that.
</strong><hr></blockquote><p>We attended Retrouvaille. My H loved it except for the religious stuff--I attended mass (optional BTW) alone. There was no breaking into smaller groups, and there was time offered for group sharing, but that is optional only. IOW, IF you want to share something with the group, you may, but no one is expected to.<p>The only time you are expected to speak out loud to the group is the first night when you introduce yourself and your spouse. You can interact with other couples during meals if you wish (which I enjoyed), but we could have taken our food and gone off by ourselves if we wanted to.<p>Just wanted to make that clear so those with any fear of public speaking or small group sharing would not be deterred from taking advantage of Retrouvaille if they have that opportunity.<p>[ May 14, 2002: Message edited by: Conqueror ]</p>

Thanks to all the respondants! It is as I figured it might be. As for the cruise....I believe that it was on the recent MB's newsletter for maybe Feb 2003.
Brw

From the newsletter.<p>============================================
2. We Are Going On a CRUISE and You&#8217;re Invited
============================================<p>On February 8th, 2003, a group of Marriage Builders will be
leaving port for a week long cruise of the Western Caribbean.
Imagine spending Valentine&#8217;s Day in one of the most romantic ways
imaginable.<p>Dr. Harley will be leading the onboard workshops, assuring couples
of having a great time because they will be taught just how to
do it.<p>Details of the cruise are soon to be finalized and will be made
available on the Marriage Builders web site by mid May. However,
if you would like to be notified as soon as the information becomes
available, send your request along with your name and email address
to us at Admin@marriagebuilders.com.

I'd like to second Conqueror's comments re Retrouvaille. There was no sharing of stories or breakdowns into small groups when my H and I attended, either. If you and your S have difficulty communicating, this Weekend is a Godsend!!! It also helps to understand that we are not alone in our situations. There are normally three couples who lead the Weekend and DO share their stories. That is something that those who have attended may CHOOSE to do AFTER the W and AFTER training. Hope this helps!