This is posted in Recovery too...<p>
Okay -
Dday #2 resulted in a phone call to OW to end it and a no contact letter. Phone numbers have been changed. OW found new cell # and called - H talked to her - she threatened to come here (lives few states away) and wants to talk to me. All phone numbers changed again. No further action on my part at this point.
It has been one week no contact. H acts sad but can't talk to me about it. I have said I am here for him, whatever he needs. I have started to pull myself back up and on track AGAIN (dday #2 was just as bad as #1 IMHO). H is at the "I don't deserve someone like you. No one else would have stayed and put up with all of this. It makes me wonder why you did?" stage. I told him because I love him with my heart and soul and I believe in him.<p>Now - what do I do now? Wait? Forge ahead? And if yes - forge ahead with what? What is next? I was working on our time together before dday#2. I guess I want to do something, but am afraid to go too fast - withdrawal and all.<p>Help...

My suggestion is to follow the basics of Plan A:<p>

• Set a time limit.
• Eliminate LBs.
• Meet whatever ENs he allows.

<p>Spending leisure time together is also one of the steps for ending the A the right way, so definitely keep going with that. Don't pursue. Don't try to get him to talk. Just be as enjoyable to be around as possible. Be as physically close as he'll allow. I always started with massages as my H would usually go for that, even if he was angry with me, and sometimes that would warm him up enough to cuddle or at least act somewhat as if he didn't mind having me around. Try to stay connected, but not hovering or suffocating. Dr. Harley says the worst is usually over after 3 weeks of no contact.

Thanks - I think a massage is in order and on the agend for tonight! Wish me luck. [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img]

Good luck! [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img] [img]images/icons/cool.gif" border="0[/img] [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img]