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Joined: Jan 2002
Posts: 817
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Joined: Jan 2002
Posts: 817 |
The plan A is going well, but I'm thinking that before I move to plan B (which I do still feel is sometime away) that I be suggesting to H that we go to marriage counselling.<p>I'll remind you that he is still unsure whether to commit to the marriage although he said he does have 'feelings' for me still, he is still in contact with OW but denies it and denies that he is 'in love' or that it is an affair. <p>We did attend counselling together before I 'found out'. This was a bad experience as H did not reveal the affair and told the counsellor all he wanted to hear. The counsellor quickly came to the conclusion that it was 'my problem'. Hence my H told me after he moved out that he did not need counselling as he had his mates to help him. I've not brought it up since and I am attending Individual Counselling about once per month, but doing lots of my own homework.<p>As plan A has had a ok results in the last few weeks, do you think I should bring up the subject again? Will it help if he is still in denial about the affair. Should I just continue my plan A and suggest it just before I am ready for plan B? I feel that whether we stay together or split up we should have counselling together. <p>What are other's experiences? Maybe I could test the water with him? <p>Considering my past experience with couple counselling I'm a bit hesitant but I will be 'screening' the counsellor before I attend to make sure that they are for saving my marriage and are willing to probe.<p>Note I do not live in US so can't attend Harley's (although I wish I could).
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Joined: Jun 2001
Posts: 315
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Joined: Jun 2001
Posts: 315 |
Hi Seahorse - just saw you there and wanted to say Gday, I figure your online.<p>Dancer
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Joined: Jan 2002
Posts: 817
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Joined: Jan 2002
Posts: 817 |
Hi Dancer, hope everything is ok with you.
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Joined: Jun 2001
Posts: 315
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Joined: Jun 2001
Posts: 315 |
Usually good, but lately Ive been getting really depressed again. I thought it was just hormonal but its persisted for over a month. I spoke with a close friend tonight and she reminded me that the enemy is probably changing his course of action again, as he does when you finally get to that deserved place of rest. It never ends. I'm going to write another thread and winge on there. I hope youre getting thru each day. Ive been thinking of you and your family. I'm sorry Plan A sucks for you. Ive kind of given up being nice to my H. Lately I just cared less. What an attitude Ive developed!<p>Dancer
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