Is it possible that someone who has had multiple affairs (2 within the last year and a half) is doing it more because of an addiction to the drama and the need for being admired and wanted sexually than it is about her spouse not meeting her needs? Please let me know what you think..... Thanks.

Well, if she was being admired and wanted sexually by her spouse - and it was communicated in a way that SHE needs and understands it, she wouldn't be needing to seek it elsewhere...right?<p>You aren't responsible for her choices - but don't be so quick to decide that you didn't participate in the creation of the environment that led to her vulnerability.

love*bites <p>Yes it certainly is possible. I don't think anyone is perfect at meeting your S's needs. After an A to look back and say that your mistakes "contributed to making her vulnerable" is the sort of self-flagellation I don't think you need right now.<p>I see this is your first post and I'm sure you're in pain. Believe me, I know how you feel. My W had multiple A's too and It's been a real struggle but we're surviving. My W is addicted to sexual attention. I would say that if this were a serious factor for your W, you'd probably see all the cross-addictions. My W has been in treatment twice for drugs and alcohol, and once for sexual addiction, so I know there are times when your S can have ENs that are unhealthy, and impossible to fill. <p>All of that notwithstanding, there is a bit of "addiction" in most A's a sort of "temporary addiction" if I can be excused for the oxymoron. Anyway, whatever the condition of your M, you were in it too and you didn't choose to cheat. So try to relax. All the MBs talk of "unmet needs" is important in rebuilding an affair-proof M, but is often misapplied when looking backwards IMHO.<p>David