Has only here been treated for PTSD with EMDR? If you have, how did it work for you?<p>Thanks!!<p>K

a fellow MB called hangin in had a thread awhile ago about this..maybe you could look it up. i remember he got good responses.

Nikko,
Thanks for pointing it out. I did a search and found it.<p>Thanks again.<p>K

I had some EMDR therapy, but unfortunatly never got to really finish it (they moved my therapist to a different city and it was too far to go often enough). It was really interesting! Each therapist tends to do it a different way, but I think you get results. It just kind of helps your brain re-process old traumas in a new, healthier way.

Thanks hope4future!<p>The reason I was asking is that I had my second session today and it was just horrible! [img]images/icons/frown.gif" border="0[/img] I was triggered beyond belief and it was like I was back at d-day. I couldn't continue, it hurt too damned much. <img src="graemlins/teary.gif" border="0" alt="[Teary]" /> I came home and cried like a blubbering idiot. I asked [H] a TON of questions and that really helped.<p>After that I called work and said I can't come in, I just can't handle it. I just feel like such an idiot. Why would I do this to myself.<p>I just wanted to know if anyone else had that experiance. I'm kind of scared to go back next week. [img]images/icons/frown.gif" border="0[/img] <p>Any thoughts??<p>K

When I went it was for childhood trauma. Many things that I went through as a child, I processed as a child...so she was trying to let me "re-experience" the moments as an adult so they could be reprocessed with my more informed, more mature mind. It really seemed to make terribly scary images in my mind fade to nothing.<p>I have had many people tell me, though, that they were EXTREMELY drained after a tough session. We never got far enough along to deal with the really tough stuff so I didn't have that experience. Now that you know how you might feel afterwords...maybe you can schedule accordingly?<p>Don't be afraid to face your fears and pain...in the long run it's much easier to deal with it than to bury it.<p>Hope it goes better for you next time!!!

Hey, you're in CO? I lived there for years...I'm in NE now! Dontcha feel sorry for me??? LOL!

Yeah, I hated it, dreaded it, felt really drained but felt so great the next day and reprocessed the trauma in a way that distanced it from me. <p>You have that safe place or remote control or whatever the therapist uses for a reason. It is OK to say that we are going to fast. <p>What is wrong with crying like a blubbering idiot? You need to process this and that sounds like a good way. Formerly not a good crier I find that sobbing uncontrollably helps.<p>Are you OK now? Hugs to you. This stuff is always tough.<p>Also wondering if there was buried stuff stored in the same area of the brain that was deeper and stronger that you didn't get to process. Abandonment? Betrayal? What was the predominant feeling that you were experiencing?

Hope,<p>I think you're right. I'm scared to face it full on again. But it was my chice to go back into therapy. <p>I had a couple of mini break downs and was on the way to a full fleged emotional breakdown. I told myself, I'm tired of this, tired of feeling this way. It's all in the past, why can't I get past it. My codependency was also taking over again and I didn't want it to take over. I tried to deal with it on my own but it wasn't working so I sought professional help.<p>I've also been stressed to the max (work and medical issues) so I know that contibuted to it.<p>I should have scheduled my next appointment for the end of the day but blubbering me just wanted to get it scheduled and get out of there.<p>Thank you again for replying, it really means a lot to me. Also thanks for being a voice of reason!! [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img] <p>On a happier note, yep, we're in Colorado. [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img] NE, ewww! [img]images/icons/shocked.gif" border="0[/img] [img]images/icons/tongue.gif" border="0[/img] <p>K

<blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by nursebetty:
<strong>Are you OK now? Hugs to you. This stuff is always tough.?</strong><hr></blockquote><p>I am ok now. I had a very long concersation with [H] and later we ate lunch. I was so drained I took a 3 hour nap! [img]images/icons/shocked.gif" border="0[/img] Thanks for the hugs, I needed them. [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img] <p> <blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>Also wondering if there was buried stuff stored in the same area of the brain that was deeper and stronger that you didn't get to process. Abandonment? Betrayal? What was the predominant feeling that you were experiencing?<hr></blockquote><p>All of the above including inadquate, sad and immense anger. I think that it was buried so deep that when it all came out it scared me. I thought I was A LOT further along than I was. [img]images/icons/frown.gif" border="0[/img] That scares me too. <p>You all are a god send. Thank you!!<p>K

Thank you again nikko, hope4future, and nursebetty for all your responses!!!<p>I did go back in fact this morning. It was amazing. I can totally said that I feel 100% better!!! [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img] [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img] [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img] A lot of it also had to do with [H]. He is just an amazing man. He answered all the really tough questions and really supported me. I love you with all that I am [H].<p>Now I just need to think of any other trigger and work on those. We're also working on "future" triggers. <p>Thank you ladies again for your support. It means more than you will ever know.<p>Have a wonderful Tuesday!!! [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img] <p>K

I know exactly what you mean. When I started EMDR we only scratched the surface and what was buried really surprised and scared me. I really want to continue, but I need to find someone who does it a bit closer. Glad to hear you're feeling better!!! [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img]

Hi K,
How funny, I was going to look back and find this thread to post to you , when I got here, you had already been posting today.<p>I had a session of EMDR last night, we are starting with childhood stuff, but I might find its related to my marriage stuff... abandoment, fear... it was draining, and then I had a related dream too as she said I might.<p>I am glad you sound better after a second session. I am an expert at burying things inside so I think it really good for me to get it out.... Instead of turning it in. Did you tell your counseler about your reacting last time? Maybe they can do a little more to close the session before you leave. <p>Good luck

Hey there K!!!<p>I'm so relieved to hear things went better today - I was getting a bit worried after our last couple of 'chats'.
Also glad that [H] is being so supportive...you two just promise to keep on talking with eachother ok?<p>Going to have to run now...sorry to be so short winded but the home business thing is keeping me pretty busy at the moment.
Don't worry though...lunch tomorrow is all clear!!<p> [img]images/icons/wink.gif" border="0[/img] [img]images/icons/cool.gif" border="0[/img] [img]images/icons/tongue.gif" border="0[/img] [img]images/icons/wink.gif" border="0[/img] [img]images/icons/cool.gif" border="0[/img] [img]images/icons/tongue.gif" border="0[/img]

Hope4future<p> <blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>I know exactly what you mean. When I started EMDR we only scratched the surface and what was buried really surprised and scared me. I really want to continue, but I need to find someone who does it a bit closer. Glad to hear you're feeling better!!! <hr></blockquote><p>Ditto! It scared me too. Now if you only lived here instead on NE you could see my therapist! [img]images/icons/tongue.gif" border="0[/img] She is really wonderful.<p>Get going on your mission to find someone closer to you! I really feel that it is worth it.<p>Hugs!
K

Lora!<p> <blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>Hi K,
How funny, I was going to look back and find this thread to post to you , when I got here, you had already been posting today.<hr></blockquote><p>See, I just knew that this would help others too. [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img] <p> <blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>I had a session of EMDR last night, we are starting with childhood stuff, but I might find its related to my marriage stuff... abandoment, fear... it was draining, and then I had a related dream too as she said I might.<hr></blockquote><p>Ditto, ditto DITTO!! Except I don't think my abandoment and fear was a childhood thing. I did dream even more after my first session. I know they were really weird but I don't remember them. <p>My therapist also told me that other things might come up too. You might remember other issues. Also, what ever you were discussing might actually be worse after the session. Just in case you feel worse, I guess its supposed to be "normal."<p> <blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>I am glad you sound better after a second session. I am an expert at burying things inside so I think it really good for me to get it out.... Instead of turning it in. Did you tell your counseler about your reacting last time? Maybe they can do a little more to close the session before you leave. <p>Good luck <hr></blockquote><p>Ditto yet again! That's why I was so upset and scared. I didn't realize that I just held it in. I thought I was really progressing well. It really burst my bubble.<p>I did tell her my reaction and my further blubbering idiot break down. We're going to make sure I stay and not just run like hell.<p>On a really good note, the "picture" that we were working on is now down to a 0! [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img] [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img] [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img] <p>I know its working but a girl friend further confirmed it for me today. When I got to work, she said, WOW, you look good and you sound good. Therapy must really be working!! I'm so happy for you. Let me tell you, I cried when she told me that.<p>Take care Lora and I hope EMDR works well for you.<p>K

Soduped!!!!!<p>Hey lady! [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img] <p> <blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>I'm so relieved to hear things went better today - I was getting a bit worried after our last couple of 'chats'.
Also glad that [H] is being so supportive...you two just promise to keep on talking with eachother ok?<hr></blockquote><p>Awww you are such a sweet woman! Thank you for worring about me. <p>I promise to keep talking, no matter what. I will NOT hold it in. I will not be scared. I will keep communicating. Ok, that was more for me. [img]images/icons/wink.gif" border="0[/img] <p> <blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>Going to have to run now...sorry to be so short winded but the home business thing is keeping me pretty busy at the moment.<hr></blockquote><p>Ahh yes, you're just kickin butt! We need to talk about it soon.<p> <blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>Don't worry though...lunch tomorrow is all clear!!<hr></blockquote><p>YEA!!!!! [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img] [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img] [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img] Now only if it was lunch with you. [img]images/icons/frown.gif" border="0[/img] I'll bring the coffee, you get the smokes? [img]images/icons/wink.gif" border="0[/img] <p>Thank you for being you sweetie. You are an amazing woman who I admire greatly. Talk to you tomorrow.<p>Hug all the guys for me.<p>Hugs and Love!
K

All~<p>In my post earlier today I talked about working on "future" triggers with my therapist. [H] and I have talked about this and he said it was ok with him if I asked for your help with this.<p>Here's the situation and its a doozy! FIL came to [H] about a month ago and stated that he's having an EA. SMIL (step mother in-law) move out a couple of weeks earlier and took YS with her. FIL has OD with him.<p>The weekend before we were going on vacation FIL asked to borrow money to fly OW here. We didn't have it at the time and I was NOT comfortable with the situation. So we didn't loan him the money.<p>Oh get this one! FIL's OW is from Washington and he met her online!! [img]images/icons/shocked.gif" border="0[/img] Trigger city for me!<p>FIL has said some not so nice things to me and I'm trying to let them go. We are trying to stay out of this as it is not our business and it just hurts too damned much.<p>FIL picked up his OW last Monday from the train station and now its most likely a PA. As I said before, we're trying to stay out of it but we just keep getting sucked back in.<p>My Mom and FIL's Mom talk all the time. FIL's Mom sent my Mom an email and it went like this. FIL's Mom called a couple of times and FIL's OW picked up the phone. FIL's Mom also called on Father's Day because she thought he might be sad that YS wasn't with him. FIL's OW answered the phone and said FIL, get up, I think its your Mom. FIL's Mom is now numb. She says that she hope its not what she thinks it is, but it probably is.<p>When my Mom got the email she asked me how to respond. Long story short, [H] sent FIL's Mom an email explaining what we know. We're waiting for the poop to hit the fan.<p>Ok, now that you have the REALLY long version of the background, how do I deal with this? Eventually I'll have to meet her.<p>This is the "future" things that I'm working on with my therapist. She has me imagine the worst possible scenario and we work though it.<p>Enough rambling, any thoughts or opinions?<p>Thanks a ton!
K