W got to me again. She took our son to see Pokemon stuff at a big mall. First she never said anything to me about it, I found out from my son after w and I had a public arguement over child support(she sandbagging her income), and second om had to drive because it was so far away ! <BR>I really feel she did this in spite over the fight we had. Then my son tells me that om is nice and funny too!<BR>I just want to explode !!! I don't know whether to cry or ??????????<BR>I knew that they would eventually meet and had resigned myself to this, but it still hurts sooooo bad! I know my son didn't mean any harm but still.<BR>I also don't want to give w satisfaction that she got under my skin either so all I can do is vent here. All my friends are out for the evening, after all it is Sat nite and the only people sitting home are the ones being screwed over by our spouses and soon to be xs<BR>

Hey RWD <P>Not alone here, I'm home to!!! Isn't great to be one of the screwed over!!<P>That's OK - life is gonna pick up for us, I know it will. And the best part about it will be that we will have a life knowing that we did what we had to as far as responsibility and committments.....We don't have to worry about any lies in our lives coming back to bite us on the butt, either!!!!<P>Your son telling you about the fun and the OM had to really stab at your heart!! I'm so sorry - you don't deserve such anguish!!!! You are very strong - I thank God that I don't have children because that is the one thing I would never be able to deal with!!! I lost my mind on H once when he took the dog to go running in the park with one of his lay-dies and her dog. I threatened H with bodily harm if he ever brought my dog near any of his disgusting diseased ridden friends again!!! <P>And that was just a dog, for goodness sakes!!!!<P>I can't help you feel better about this really, but I can understand and be here for you!!!! a BIG HUG to you!!!<P>Your children might experience occasional fun and excitement with the attention, getting things they want and the newness of it all....but RWD, this is quick to pass and they will realize and understand that you are the only stable one in their lives and that you did not leave them or break up their family.<P>Try to think of that when these occasions occur and don't let yourself believe that they will care about him like they do about you......It will never happen!!!!! Never EVER!!!!!<P>Just love them and take care of them and keep the stability in their lives.<P>We're here for you!!!!<P>Hugs and Strength,<P>Sheba<P>PS - Boy, I wish there was a way we could interact on this board - I could go for a good hand of poker or something!!!! Just think - all us at-homers could have something to do that's safe from temptation or money spending!!!!!

RWD,<P>This sucks. I know how you feel. It is so, so hard. Especially when it comes to our children. <BR>I don't know what to tell you, I wish I did. I myself am having trouble on how to handle the children issue. Our children deserve so much more than what is happening to them. <BR>I am sending you a hug. I know that doesn't make things any better, but you know that we are here for you.<P>Cheryl

I just put my son to bed and got to hear more about om. " He's like a kid, he has all these model boats, etc" EHHHHHHHHHHHH!<BR>I was going to go out for a drink but now I'm too mad !!!! I don't want to do anything stupid. So I guess I'll sit here with my quart and vent!!!!!!!<BR>That's a quart of ice cream.

RWD....<P>I'm so sorry this happenned to you...I don't know what to say right now, but stay strong and hang in there.<P>p.s. Right now, I'm eating ice cream too.....

RWD<BR>I'm a little synical tonight so excuse me.<BR>Yes the OM is like a kid - Peter Pan living in the fantasy world of immediate self gratification!!!!!!<BR>My story is this - My H spent some time in Never Never land. Unfortunately Tinkerbelle was busy with someone else's husband so he had to settle for her half sister Moronbelle.<BR>Vent all you want. This is a very difficult thing you have to deal with. Your kids know who is reliable. Just keep doing what you're doing. You're doing a great job!<p>[This message has been edited by wasstubborn (edited September 11, 1999).]

Hi guys -<P>I'm here with my ice-cream too!!! Chocolate Chip with Chocolate Sprinkles!<P>Hmmm-Hmmm GOOD!!!!!!! Don't know who it is but I'm in love with the person who invented chocolate!!!!! Even if it's a woman!!!! Hey - might be a nice change!!!!! LOL!!! NOT!!!<P>Rwd - Just a thought : I don't know what, if anything, you said to your son but just make sure to say things like: "Glad you had a good time" or "that's nice" You don't want to make him feel bad by saying anything negative....I'm sure you know all this!!! Just want to make sure cuz sometimes we don't know what we say when we're upset or angry with all this doo-doo we're mired in.<P>What kind of ice cream you got?<P>Hugs,<P>Sheba

I'm sorry it happened RWD. It just hurts incredibly to hear our children say nice things about the op.<BR>I climbed the walls when my H took the kids to watch a soccer game and the ow as well.<BR>They came back saying the "nice lady" had played funny games with them and that she was really nice. I felt like grabing my H and stick his head on the toilet.<BR>Kids are not seing things from our angle. They are meetintg someone new and ( either we want to rememeber that or not ) the op doesn't have to be a monster, he/she will probably be nice to the kids specially if they want ot be in our spouses good side. The kids will take it at face value, since they're not aware of what the undercurrents are. In any case it really hurts, and I'm sorry it happened to you.<P>Agree with sheba with what you should tell your child. It really is the better option.Don't take his reaction personally, deep down he knows grown-ups are not just like a kid, so it can't be real.<P>Hey sheba, my day has been great, but I'll go for the ice-cream too, if you share. Only...have any without chocolate? I'll love if you have something with nuts in it. Pecans if possible ( getting picky hey? )<P>Take care<BR>Kat<P><P>------------------<BR>Each and everyone of us is deserving of a kind word, a gentle thought, and the gift of understanding.

Hey Kat -<P>Sorry!!!! No nuts here!!! Besides me of course!!! LOL!! (Stop nodding your head!! That's a joke, RWD!!!!)<P>I'm allergic to nuts!!! Not to chocolate though, Thank God!!<P>Will Plain Old Vanilla do?<P>Glad your birthday is going well. May you have many more and may H figure out how to do them right - just the way YOU like 'em!!!!<P>Hugs,<P>Sheba

Ooh!!! I forgot to say this!!!<P>WS - you crack me up!!!! I like your story.......tell us more!!!!<P>Feel like a kid sitting here eating my ice-cream and now Auntie WS will contiue her fairy tale for all of us......<P>Gather round kiddies!!!!!!<P>Hugs,<P>Sheba

Sheba<BR>Imagine my H's reaction when I told him that story!!!<BR>I did!<BR>Do you think it helped him go to sleep.<BR>Told you I'm cynical tonight.

Thanks for all your replies !!!!!!!!!<BR>After talking to my assiatant pastor, then my pastor and his wife and some friends, i was finally able to overcome my hurt and anger.<BR>One thing I question though is that my asst pastor said tell the kids that I don't want to hear about om because it hurts. I'm not sure I want to tell them that as I do want them to be able to talk to me no how terrible it is to me.<BR>It was rainbow sherbet.

Rwd -<P>I was wondering where you went off to last nite!!!<P>Glad you were getting some support!!! I don't agree with the assistant pastor and I'm glad that you don't seem to either. You don't have to ask any details that would lead the kids to discuss it further and therefore they will only say what's on their mind at the moment and drop it. It won't be a big deal to them, but if you point out that it hurts you or you don't want to hear it - then it will stick in their minds and add the burden of why you are reacting that way.<P>Much too much for those brains too handle. I think the short and sweet non-committed comments or accentuating their part in the event is the best approach.<P>Rainbow Sherbert Hmmmmm......that sounds good!!! Haven't had that in a long time!!<P>Hope you're feeling better!!<P>Hugs,<P>Sheba