It has been over one year since the D'day. Our relationship has not shown any progress. As a matter of fact, we are now leading totally mechnical life within the four walls without any emotion or love. The level of inter-personal communication is almost non-existant. Most of my endeavour to initiate dialogue has met with resistance and/or rebuke about my past actions.

Notwithstanding, I love my wife and very much want to make up with her. It was my irresponsible actions which has resulted the current situation and I have no one else to to blame.

I need guidance from people in similar situation to tell me what should be my next move. I have no contact with OW and have tried my best to undergo self-improvement programme spiritually. I am also very sorry for causing all these hurt and pain to my BW and other members of family.

Can any one help me?
Ash
WH- 54,
BS- 52.
M- 26 years.
D-25 & S-22.

How proactive is your Plan A?

Is it just a passive wait and see?

Are you introducing any "romance" or "passion" into your daily living...
...r & p is always a good ice breaker to a woman's heart.

There are numerous good books on rekindling romance...
...check them out at Books!

<img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

Jim/NSR

Hi Ash,

I am the BS. I have tried for three years to get my H to leave the OW. It has been on and off for three years. What i have learned thru all this is that actions will speak louder than words. Your W should be happy that you say what you say. Can she trust you again? You need to prove you are trustworthy to your W,D and S. Everyone is hurting more than you can imagine. I've been married for 21years, D10,S 14 and 16. We are all hopeing and trying to live by every word. HOWEVER he has been lying thru three years of counseling. Be honest with your family. they will come around and your marriage will be better than ever! Good Luck!
</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by ash:
<strong>It has been over one year since the D'day. Our relationship has not shown any progress. As a matter of fact, we are now leading totally mechnical life within the four walls without any emotion or love. The level of inter-personal communication is almost non-existant. Most of my endeavour to initiate dialogue has met with resistance and/or rebuke about my past actions.

Notwithstanding, I love my wife and very much want to make up with her. It was my irresponsible actions which has resulted the current situation and I have no one else to to blame.

I need guidance from people in similar situation to tell me what should be my next move. I have no contact with OW and have tried my best to undergo self-improvement programme spiritually. I am also very sorry for causing all these hurt and pain to my BW and other members of family.

Can any one help me?
Ash
WH- 54,
BS- 52.
M- 26 years.
D-25 & S-22.</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">

Hi Ash,

Well most of us BS posting here would be happy if our Ws were at the point you are. So I will ask an obvious BS question:

Is your W aware of MB concepts? Is she willing to read our info here? Is she willing to share her side and post here? SEveral couples have posted here in the past.

One couple that may be helpful is SEM (H - BS) and KeepSmiling (W - Xws). They have both helped many.

Check it out with your W and let us know.

take care,
L.

Dear All,

Thank you for your respective guidances.

Yes My W is fully aware of MB and other sites and visits these very regularly. Yet, she is still under thick fog, I guess I have to wait till it lifts off.

As for me I am sincere to the core about my intent to rebuild the marriage. But it needs two hands to clap. So I need some potive response in order to proceed further in the road of recovery.

I am fully aware how much pain and agony I have given to my immediate family members by my deeds. I regret these and trying to make up as much as I can.

It is my feeling, without some degree of spirit of "Forgiveness" nothing can work. I am waiting for Lord to bestow such spirit to my W. I do not hold any feeling against her for her current mental state, only I am responsible for this.

Many thanks for your inputs.

ASH