I think today would be my Mom's birthday. She died when I was 4.5. I realized today that I've outlived her by 7 years! Our marriage has lasted twice as long as my parents did. My son is almost the age I was when I lost my mom. It's kind of a weird feeling.
My husband is not the man I married. I think that guy died, cause I just don't see him ANYWHERE any more. This guy does laundry and doesn't complain about it. If the dishes get too high, he loads the dishwasher instead of nagging me about it. He looks forward to going places and never once complains or even comments on the cost. This is the guy who wouldn't buy me a dishwasher because it wouldn't make us money 5 years ago...but he didn't do dishes either...and I was working as many hours a week as he was.
The other day son and I found a stray calf while we were on a walk. Went and got hubby and we all headed out after it. That thing had been without its mommy atleast 3 days, yet it was rambunkuos as ever. Hubby chased it up one steep hill and down another. I hopped on our 4 wheeler and went to head it off. Hubby was yelling something so I turned it off to hear him. Well, he was yelling to hurry and head it off!! OOps! Couldn't get the thing restarted for NOTHING, because I'd shut it off before I put it in neutral. Go figure. Well, I got it restarted but not in time to head off the calf...who was now headed into the cornfield. It took us another hour to finally catch it and hubby had walked and run most of that time. I told son that daddy was probably going to be grouchy. In the past when things like this happend he was. Heck, I wouldn't have blamed him for being grouchy!!! He wasn't...not at all...told me he was sure glad we found it and told him about it. HUH??? WHO ARE YOU!!!??
He wasn't very active in our sons life until he realized I was planning on leaving. He was more of an uncle than a dad. But then he turned in to super dad. At the time I thought it was a ploy...either to influence me, or to possibly influence the courts! I wasn't sure. But as time went on it was obvious that he'd really woken up to what he had and might miss out on if he didn't take an active role in sons life. And he still is! He takes son with him everywhere, and always takes time to answer all his questions. He's so patient with him, but still disciplines and has no problem telling him no. He hugs and kisses son and tells him he loves him and isn't embarassed about it at all, like some men are.
I'm just extremely thankful to have the life I have. I'm happy to be alive and emotionally healthy. I'm happy to have a wonderful family and a wonderful home. I can think of plenty of things that I wish were different...my family closer, a closer group of friends, more money and less work, another child, more romance, better furniture...but not having those things doesn't take away from the happiness I do have either. Getting everything you want doesn't guarantee you'll be happy once you get it. Being happy with what you have does.
Ahh well...just some thoughts I wanted to jot down. Thanks for the airtime <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />
