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Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 235
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Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 235 |
Neither by hook nor by crook, coercion or manipulation, I finally had the strength to mean it when I told WH I could really D him if I had to. And the end result was that he agreed to counseling.
So now I have found a counselor who specializes in marriage and our particular issues. My question is this: What do I expect? What do I bring to the table? I know a C doesn't want to take sides or become "triangulated" in the therapy process. I know this isn't about bashing WH or me in terms of the things we have "done wrong" in our marriage. So how can I be prepared for the first session?
Any guidance here would be greatly appreciated.
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Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 235
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Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 235 |
Is it my perfume, or what? Aw come on, folks, surely some good MBer has advice on this one?
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Joined: Dec 1969
Posts: 6,937
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Joined: Dec 1969
Posts: 6,937 |
asgoodasitgets, You've already selected your counselor, so I'd suggest that you ask these questions of him or her. I can certainly share the process of counseling with the Harley's using the MB Phone Counseling---but that's not going to answer these questions for this specific counselor. Call them... <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />
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Joined: Jun 2002
Posts: 299
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Joined: Jun 2002
Posts: 299 |
The best thing to remember is be open minded. When I had my first session with Steve, he brought up some things I had to change and I normally would have been defensive. I might have taken the attitude that, hey, my husbands the one having the affair he has to change. But instead I looked at what I could change and asked my husband to talk to Steve and he agreed.
Good luck,
Keep us posted,
Layli
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Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 235
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Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 235 |
Thanks K and Layli. Good advice. I'm prepared to hear that I need to change and I'm prepared to make the effort. I guess that's all I can ask of myself at this point.
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