Highlighted in counseling last night.. that part of the reason my panic button has majorly gone off... is that I am the FIXER in the relationship and have been fixing everything for over 10 yrs...

I have to realize I can't fix or make my h into a better H or better dad, etc.. he is who he is.. and I have to accept it and let him fall or hopefully find himself.

I am so tired anyway.. but it was enlightening to realize my phone calls and fix it energy are from my 10 yr role and it is time to readujust and let the train crash so to speak...

GEE.. that gives me more time to think about me and the kids... let him , H, be a grown up for a while?

THanks for listening, HONEY <img border="0" title="" alt="[Razz]" src="images/icons/tongue.gif" />

Hey! You go Girl!

<img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Cool]" src="images/icons/cool.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Razz]" src="images/icons/tongue.gif" />
WAY TO GO HONEY I'M SOOOOO PROUD OF YA!!

Honey,

I don't know if you have read any of the "Boundaries" books by Clound & Townsend?? I learned alot from these, and it explains alot about crossing boundaries between people. For example,if my WH husband is in a bad mood, I should not allow him to cross into my emotional boundaries and cause me to be in a bad mood.

You can find more information on :
http://www.cloudtownsend.com

I copied a portion from the website here for you:

A boundary is a personal property line that marks those things for which we are responsible. In other words, boundaries define who we are and who we are not.

They impact all areas of our lives:

Physical boundaries help us determine who may touch us and under what circumstances.
Mental boundaries give us the freedom to have our own thoughts and opinions.
Emotional boundaries help us deal with our own emotions and disengage from the harmful, manipulative emotions of others.
Spiritual boundaries help us to distinguish God's will from our own and give us renewed awe for our Creator.

Honey,
Way to go, keep it up!!
Terry

Not in the mood for dancing, but I might take my clothes off...

E