I suspected on 6/28. I confirmed on 7/4. I have a WS. Further investigating leads me to believe that the affair is pretty new <2 months.

I have been Plan A'ing since the 28th and getting myself ready to confront. I do not know if I am capable of maintaining a Plan A after we talk and he chooses to continue the affair. I am now concerned about allowing them to carry on and get more involved. We also have out of town guests now and also next week o that mkes the timing bad. What to Do? Need your help/advice.

What-Now

I doubt there will ever be a perfect time to confront him with your knowledge. I would 'blow the lid off this' asap!! You were right, the longer it continues the more involved he will become! Keep up with the plan A. Take care of yourself(that's the most important thing!!!)

Hi - you need to tell him right away and insist on no-contact with the OP. Otherwise the affair will continue indefinitely. There was a poll by Spacecase that said, if the affair does not end, then plan B is necessary in about 2/3 of the cases.

He will try to deny it. So make sure that you have your ducks in a row, as far as the proofs. Just present your evidence as matter-of-factly as you can, and try not to argue with him over the accuracy of your facts.

I agree, I don't know that I would do this particular thing with guests in the house. But I did start my plan B with a guest in the house. The presence of others within a distant earshot, may help to keep you from love-busting, and both of you from yelling. There are consequences to having an affair, and your H probably needs to see some of them before he stops. It's not necessary for you to pretend that everything's fine.

Good luck.

- Tom

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by what-now:
<strong>I suspected on 6/28. I confirmed on 7/4. I have a WS. Further investigating leads me to believe that the affair is pretty new <2 months.

I have been Plan A'ing since the 28th and getting myself ready to confront. I do not know if I am capable of maintaining a Plan A after we talk and he chooses to continue the affair. I am now concerned about allowing them to carry on and get more involved. We also have out of town guests now and also next week o that mkes the timing bad. What to Do? Need your help/advice.

What-Now</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">As you say it is hard when A is out in day light to plan A, WS might push you away ... review your plan A and get as much info. as possible about your part of this dismay of M and show changes. When you are ready you should confront WH ... no LB !!!!. If you think you can't take it afterward ... use tough love. Set the boundry what it takes for WH to work on M otherwise you do whatever it needs to preserve your LB$ to H ... including implementing plan B.

As tmmx point out get your duck in a row.

Good luck-RH-