Hi Everybody,
I need your help and advice. My X came over yesterday. We've had a five year marriage with lots of hurt and neglect. No affair. No children. Divorced in May. Our marriage was never great. It was good in the beginning, but never great. I know, since I have lived in a GREAT marriage before. He died. This is my second marriage I need help with. He's thoughts and wishen were not given much consideration in the relationship, and I was completely neglected emotionally. I was married to a computer. He made a decision to move in April, but did not actually move out until 3 weeks ago. I begged him to reconcider. He refused. I offered counseling, refused it again. So, finally before he moved out I made my intensions very clear, that once he's gone, he'll be gone from my life forever. I don't think he took me seriously. Since that day he's been wanting to start fresh with me, but I just want this nightmare to be over. Yesterday I told him I have started a new life already. With the feelins I have in my heart for him after all this, I could never love him or care for him again. Every time he calls, he pretends like nothing happened between us and like waiving a magic wand, I have forgotten everything. We both agree, meither of us would want to go back to a life we've shared before. I told him I was vwry angry with him, I resent the fact he was not willing to give us a chance back then, and now I resent him as an individual. "I never immagined you will be like this" he told me. He figured he leaves for awhile (signed a year lease), and I'm just going to wait around, continue on with my sleepless nights hoping maybe someday we can be together again. We were never soul mates. I don't have "those good times" and "good memories" I miss from our marriage. In my opinion, to survive a separation, there has to be a lot more love, caring, and respect for each other than what we have or have ever had. We never truly bonded. Last week I have met a wonderful person. It should feel great, I should be so happy, and I am, But why do I feel so guilty?
