I finally got my last straw. I know to some of you it may not be much, but to me it was an eyeopener. My H is always going to choose being with ow over me. He says he loves me, but he needs her for emotional support.They are supposedly fighting their mutual attraction very hard.Anyhow, I want to leave now. I know I am being emotional, but I am not sure it will change anything. H could not would not commit to our marriage, to quit seeing this girl, etc. Now when I make the move to leave,he is willing to promise anything. I do not want him to make promises now. But I do need to get away. I must get away. He does not want me to leave, or to postpone my decision. But will it change anything? Am I making the wrong move. I feel I need to assert myself. He had to go to work. He asked me to promise to stay till he returned. I did not promise, but I do want to be out of here before he returns. Please help with plan B letter.

I'm not sure how long you did plan A. Was it successful? Did you do it for 6 months or so? Are you losing your love for your husband? Would you be using plan B as an eye opener, or would it be because you have decided that putting effort into meeting his needs is hurting and not helping, and you need to put effort into your needs?

Can you go somewhere just temporarily to give yourself some time to think? From your profile I see you've been in turmoil a long time, but did you do Plan A (that sort of behavior, even if you didn't know the term)?<P>TNT is right. Plan B is for you when your love is almost gone and you can't do Plan A anymore. You shouldn't use it to try to manipulate your spouse. If you go to Plan B, be very sure it is what you want.<P>It sounds like something has shocked you or just brought you more pain than you can cope with at the moment. Take some time. Go do something for yourself. Pray, if that is something you do. Journal. Workout. Take a walk.<P>Don't do anything you can't undo.

Thanks for the breather Lor.I did do plan A. I do not want to leave to manipulate him. I just cannot take the lying and cheating anymore. He says he loves me, but he just cannot give up on her. I know they are not physical, but he does not understand that it is not the sex. I have invited him to ask her over to the house, have her call openly and be friends openly if all he wants is a friend. I truly do not feel threatened by him having a female friend. I really just want to be out of the house.I really cannot cope. I promised not to leave before he gets home. He is upset too, please do no think he does not care for me. I'm sure he does, but he is just afraid to allow me to leave. I want him to want me to stay for the right reasons.The problem is not that I dont love him anymore, but that I love him too much and this behaviour of his is too painful.