We are gathered here together
Cause our marriage bit the dust!
We don't like the roller coaster ride
But ride on it we must

It's funny kinda feelin sometimes up & sometimes down
But we just have to get on with it
No good wearing a frown

We are here because we love our spouse
And plan that things will work
We often want to throw the towel in
when they act like suck a jerk!

We pull ourselves up by the bootstraps
Carry on as best we can
Whilst plan A ing our booties off
For our woman or our man

We wished we'd noticed sooner that things were just not right
But as usual were the last to know
And wevé had a damn good fright

We read & read & read some more
Sometimes we feel we'll burst
Knoweledge & information
Is like an unquenched thirst

But! we must all hang on in there
Keep our heads out of the sand
The power of positive thinking
Giving us a helping hand

An affair now just what is it
It's something we all fear
Theyré not in love with OP
Just in love with the idea!

One day not very far away
Our spouses fog will clear
What the hell was I thinking?
Will be ringing thru their ear

And who will be there waiting
When this all comes rushing out
We! the spouses that had faith
That this all would turnabout!

So to the Marriage Building family
Lets pull together all we can
We can build & learn together
To be the very best for our woman or our man!!

Cool!

That's the spirit!

LIR

P.S. You said on your other thread that H is going into the hospital - so how come his dad has to stay with you? What's up with dad?

Yeah - I think his question - "what days to you have off next week?" deserves the answer "Why do you want to know?". My H is a musician - there's someone who rings him whenever he needs someone to stand in at the last minute and he always calls up and says - "Are you doing anything next Tuesday?" for example - if you say no then you're stuck trying to find a good reason why you can't do him a favour - its a manipulative opening and not a fair question. So if he ever does this again, think fast and waffle hard - either point blank ask him why he wants to know and then be up front about whether you can or can't or don't want to do what he has in mind - or say something like "I'm not sure - so-and-so said she wanted to do something on that day, but hasn't got back to me" (although to be honest, this isn't really the best option - its a form of lying) - its better to be upfront and try to get him to be upfront.

As to him and OW - try not to get wound up in thinking too much about how their R is going - I have listened to my mom for 30 years - she STILL looks for cracks in my dad's R with his 2nd wife (who was the OW). Now - my dad IS one of the ones who left wife and family, set up house with the OW and shoved her in everybody's face AND they fight like a cat and dog - the mean and hurtful things they have said and done would fill a book. Some men do this - they do leave their families and never come back to the marriage, even when they find they are not happy. Pride is a desperately strong thing. But my mom would have had a lot happier life if she had tried to let go of him and got on with her own life. God knows this is hard - but for your sake, try to look the other way and get on with your fantastic achievement - losing 70 lbs is a fantastic achievment in ANYBODY's books - your H may have to go through a lot more Hell with OW before he appreciates you for what you are - if you are not careful, you will get torn apart inside watching the drama of their "soap-opera". In the meantime, try not to let him "use" you to pick up after him - its good to still feel needed, but not if you are still being "mommy" - he turned his back on you so how come dad can't stay with OW, for example?

Take care,
LIR

Well H dad was very upset that we were seperated because of a friendship with OW he treats me like one of his own daughters. H dad aranged to come on holiday down here & was gonna stay 1 night with each of us but he doesn't know that it is now a full on affair so will wait & see what happens. Our son doesnt know H is going into hospital & he is coming to stay with me 2morrow so i guess i will have to tell him. Anyway H paged me yesterday & said he got the dates wrong it is next weekend his dad is coming anyway I waited till this morning & paged H back & said thanx for letting me know that as I would have been away (just to let H know I'm not just sitting here stewing while he has a great time..
Well have my appt with steve 2nite so will keep ya all posted. PLeased ya liked the poem it was just something that came into my head so i had 2 write it down..

wrungout,

I liked the poem, it says a lot with few words.

I do wonder how many of us will have the patience to still be waiting for our SP when the ride is over.

I am not a rollercoaster fan, so I always stood around while H and kids did those at the parks. don't know that I'll wait for this one to be over. I'm tired!!

Dawn <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />