Dear WS:

I have let you go. I have tried to tell you over this past several months how painful this has been for me. It has been devastating. I know this has been a difficult and painful time for you. You seem to have the impression that some things were meant to be. I do not believe that you and OW were meant tto be but I had to make a choice between you and my sanity. I choose sanity and the possibility of someday finding happiness again. This was the hardest thing I have ever done. But I had to let you go see what it was you were seeking so diligently. I truly hope you can get over your addiction to OW and come home and that the door will still be open, but if not I wish yu all the happiness in the world. You know the saying, "If you love someone let them go. If they do not come back they were never yours to begin with." What I know for sure is that I have and always will love you. I have more happy memories that sad and I will hold onto them forever.

The conditions I put on this marriage will remain and never change. I will not share you with another woman and condone extramarital affairs. I will only welcome you back into my life if you agree to take extrodinary measures to rebuild our marriage. I expect that those conditions will be the same for you should you choose to marry again. Why would you expect me to accept less? I do not deserve less and I will not accept it.

Although this is a very difficult process I feel confident that you go away knowing that I tried everything in my power to try to save our marriage. We started to create a beautiful union again only to be pulled apart by the unblessed acts of you and OW. Is this what you want your legacy to be?

Since you are reading this now you have left us. If we never see each other again please know that I loved you with all my heart. however, I do not wish to have any further contact with you while you are involved with OW. I will be in the process of moving on. I will have the children email you and you can call them. OW is lucky I know, I have felt your love before and it is a powerful thing. I pray you find the happiness you seek.

Love always,BS

W; I'll critique your letter, but wnated to offer this link to a collection of Plan B letters, where you can probably get some good ideas.

Sample Plan B Letters

It's very, very good. Your heart must have been breaking while you were writing it. It appears to have all the necessary points. It states your position clearly. Damn shame it had to get to the point where you had to write this.

((((((hugs))))))

Wucus, very nice, and well constructed.

Just one thing and forgive me for pointing it out but it needs to be spellchecked. I don't know if you cut 'n pasted it in. If you did you need to run it thru the 'ol checker.

Also I have more happy memories that sad should be I have more happy memories than sad

Good luck with it, Ben.

W;

There are a few elements that need to be present in a Plan B letter:
1. Expression(s) of your Love
2. Admission and regret for your part in damaging the relationship.
3. Separation "rules"
4. Separation Reason: Love Bank Low, to preserve the love that is left
5. Conditions for return

What should NOT be in a Plan B letter:
1. No Educating, Accusing, Demanding, LBing

I think you need to review your letter and remove all the negative parts, and add the missing elements from the top list.

Good luck, W!

Thank you all for your assistance. I actually wrote this version back in June and just felt after typing it in (badly according to some.lol) that it did not fit where I am now. MGM made me alert to that when they mentioned it sounded as if my heart was breaking. I am not there anymore and I feel fairly dispassionate about the whole thing except the need to rid it (the affair) and all involved in it from my and my children's life.
It is funny my but I ultimately emailed the version from the 'Affairs' book that Steve Harley suggests. It pretty much said it all. Thanks Spacecase for sending it.
But anyway I emailed it last night, late. And then my WS calls here and my oldest daughter answers the phone and he asks for me. Well I just sent this no contact letter to him and I don't want to talk to him!!!lol So I take the phone determined to be a brief as possible and he ask me if I want the phone number to where he will be staying. And really without thinking I so "No, not really. Okay bye." I know he had not yet been able to read the Plan B letter but... Whatever, I am so through I am fried.

Oh yeah, before I wrote the letter he emailed me and said something to the effect.

He loves me and the children, but this seemed like his only avenue (to leave us). He does not know how to stop this thing (affair) but he does not want to see me hurt. Be well. love WS

It is funny to hear him describe the affair like a train running out of control. I am just waiting for the crash.lol Bye all. Thanks again. wu