Well, Wisconsin was a hoot. Boy they love cheese and beer. had a great time with hubby.
Felt like we bonded, no fights, nothing. He had a blast and I had fun too. He spent quite a bit of time at the Everquest booth but rather than ***** about it, I joined him for the whole gencon event and was by his side for everything.
Bought his needs her needs and read it in the hotel room while he poured over his books from the gaming convention.
I am still doing the plan a. Scheduling my second appt with Steve tomorrow.
Tonight, I was watching him play his game with his friends. I have decided to try and meet his recreational needs by devising a way to be a part of his game experience. Well this one friend he plays with quite regularly, not the OW but this other one that had a crush on him, is asking to join us when we play.
Husband says no problem, then I see her type, Well I don't want to make things worse for you.
Calmly I ask him what she meant by that. He explained that her husband would get quite jealous of the time they spent so she was afraid it would cause similar problems for us.
I asked him if it maybe wasn't that she liked him a bit and maybe felt guilty?
I am not sure he realizes I saw an email he wrote talking about how this woman thought she was in love with him.
He said no. I ventured out a bit and said, "Hey, I thought we were doing better."
Asked him if he felt we were doing better and he said yes.
I just keep thinking about a post on one of my earlier threads that hope4future did where she said, hey, he loves you for the every day you and OW for the fantasy.
I am just mixed up because we talk about things in future tense, relating to us and I am afraid I am reading too much into things.
Plus things are going rather well between us, absolutely no fighting or LB-ing since I started on this sight.
Is everything too calm?
Am I so afraid of rocking the boat I don't see the iceberg ahead?
I just see a lot of fighting between lots of plan a poeple on here and I was wondering if it is strange that we don'r fight, spend more time together and are communicating better. All without me pressing the OW thing. Trying to let that die it's own death.
Sorry for the rambling. I babble a lot when I talk.
Any comments?
Thanks guys,
Hugs
Layli

Ugh...

I still do think he loves you for the every day you...but I also think he's pretty damn foggy and lost right now. It sounds like he needs to grow up and get a life. A married MAN doesn't get to live with his parents and play games all the time. Sorry...but that's the facts. I LOVE gaming...but I RARELY do it. I have a 4yr old and a marriage...as well as a job and regular household responsibilites. I could play instead of post..but I find this to be more beneficial..both to myself and others. I'm not dogging H for playing games...but he seems a bit obsessive in that area. That's pretty juvenile. I could be wrong...but it's the feeling I get.

Anyway...I still think for YOU you need to get a plan. Just hanging around Plan A'ing isn't going to pull hubby out. He may very well love you right up to the day he moves away and loves someone else. It's a good way to make the move awfully comfortable for him. From one crutch to another.

You've done your time...you've proved you can be the wife he wants. Now it's up to HIM to do some soul searching and growing up.

Get a plan...but keep the faith!!! I still think you've got a really good chance! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

Gosh, I hope they can make enough more cheese and beer to support my family event in September. They're cheese and beer nuts too!!! Wheee Wisconsin!!

Thanks for replying hope. I guess I will see how session goes with Steve. Hubby will have one too. Harley says the gaming thing has got to go. I'm afraid when it comes down to it he will choose the game. I know it sucks and if he does I should be glad to be rid of him but how great will my self esteem be on that day?
Have fun in sept in wisconsin!
Layli

layli,

I am glad that things went ok in Wisc. Sounds like you had a good time.

I do hope your session Steve tomorrow leads to what you need to be doing. You said WH had a session too?

I can kind of relate to the game thing. My
20 yoS that lives in my basement would rather play games, computer, card, board, magic, any game, then do the other things in life that need doing, it is very frustrating!! He has till the end of the month to be employed full time and a contibuting financial member of this household.

There is an age difference between the two of you, what was it that brought the 2 of you together in the first place? I am assuming it wasn't gaming!!

Dawn <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

<small>[ August 15, 2002, 09:08 PM: Message edited by: Sue with hope ]</small>

Layli

Hope things are going well.

Luci