First - Does anyone know what area code 254 is? Anyone live there? Just one of those stupid random questions... I know I could look it up... But I wanted to toss it up....
Libby,
Don't send people over to someplace hurtful to you. I'm not telling you what to do hon, but it's like drinking sour milk and then making someone else taste it when you already know it's sour. I'm sorry you were hurt by what you read - but you are in a spot right now where the only things you are going to see are the hurtful ones. Did you read how they supported me? Did you read what one woman did without my knowledge to try and stop the situation before it got out of control? That was not hurtful or horrible. From what I remember you have a really fresh wound to your heart. I'm years out, and divorced. What I see there will effect me in a much different way. Stay away from there. It won't do anything but hurt.
You have to be in a certain place in your head and heart to be there, and for me it works. If you have a question that can only be answered by an OW, and there aren't enough here that can give you what you need or answer fast enough - go there, and they will do their best.
They really will try and help. But don't go in and say hey [censored]... That would make you like the people at scarleta.
Pearly,
I feel sorry that HAH feels this was so aimed at her. It has not been and isn't, really. Actually, Dac posted on scarleta that she was going to come here to MB and ask this question about people who were BS's posting on both MB and sites for OW/OM because of the situation with me. That post has now been edited. I do have it printed out, and also have it saved another way - I thought it was pretty and wanted to keep it. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> She also said herself in a post on page one of this thread that I prompted this question.
In what way is this at all about venting and the world of cheaters? This thing here, that she started, it is all about me. And it seems as if she has gotten angry, taken her ball, and gone home.
Did she want to make everyone mad at me?
Was she hoping that people here would be infuriated that I posted at TOW and would then shun me and chastize me?
Did she think that people here who have been hurt, as I have, would automatically respond with her type of vulgar and nasty comments toward one of their own?
People at Marriage Builders have class.
Allow me to explain.
class: Elegance of style, taste, and manner.
We don't use disrespectful judgements.
We don't have angry outbursts.
We care and protect the ones we love.
And if we happen to err, we do our best to make amends. Immediately if not sooner!
Ahhhh, I'm wasting your time aren't I?
What I said about showing Clarkie my 2 vaginas was clearly a joke. Now, you give me a break. Yes, like I would find him somewhere in the US and make a point of taking my children and the disabled ex so I could give him a little show.
HAH. I understand the horrible situation you are in. No, you have no idea. Don't you
dare try and tell me you understand the horrible situation I am in. I don't know who you are, and you seem to know all these things about me, yet you don't even know the half of it.
You cannot imagine what it is like to live one moment of my life, and I would be willing to bet that if you were placed in my situation you couldn't even do half as well as I have done. I'm not being unkind, I'm just calling it as I see it. This isn't a lampoon, it's what I see as the truth.
To do the things I do on a daily basis you would need to start out as a kind and loving soul with a heart big enough to forgive the greatest wrongs. If you can spew all that venom that is on scarleta every hour there is no possible way you could clean feces off your husband an hour after you found out he had been with the OW the night before.
Yet, I wonder at your propensity to visit and befriend ow sites. It is one site that I visit, and it is not the site that I befriend, it is some of the people at the site. A propensity is a natural inclination, and so either you have not read this thread or used a word you don't know.
In case you didn't read the thread, I'll give you the quick recap. I went there first because I saw it mentioned here and wanted to look. It really upset me the first time I saw it.
I don't know all the people there, or even most. The ones I have come to know on General, I hold dear to my heart. I don't read OW/OM only, or any other forums. Ask Em did catch my eye once when the discussion was concerning a serious injury or death of a partner.
I wonder about the reason the people on scarleta feel the need to daily visit so many sites that they find to be against their moral codes. It seems odd that people would wonder why I go to one site I am obviously comfortable posting, while at the same time the ones wondering are spending hours of their day trolling the internet looking for information regarding the sexual behaviors of persons they have no connection with. And then to make the situation even more of an oddity, these same persons feel the need to describe and discuss these behaviors.
It's somewhat voyeuristic, and might even be considered kind of kinky. But that's cool with me. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Cool]" src="images/icons/cool.gif" /> For the people that do this at home, there are sites that have pictures, but I would recommend against it at work.
It's a place to let off steam and be silly... I'm sorry, I guess I didn't do it right. I was at my desk and read "Ho with sexual problems" (title from memory - it's late) and clicked on the title. It said something about 2 vaginas and my heart fell and my stomach flipped.
When it said that I was a stupid ho that couldn't tell one was my butt and the other my vagina, I was crying.
I threw up, I felt stupid, I felt like it was all my fault because I was the one who chose to post the personal information in the first place.
I considered never posting again. Anywhere.
Because of a bully.
No, my 2 vaginas are not for two MM. And, they aren't for cucumbers or anything else.
Someone at your site, or maybe more than one, can't understand the difference between me making a playful little razz about my own problems at my own expense - and how that is different than what they are saying. I know I shouldn't try and explain, but some would call it good sportsmanship.
You can forward the message to Dac & company that the reason I use the name hadahusband at TOW is because I had a husband. I no longer have one. There are several reasons.
One of your posters insists that I do have a husband, I'm unsure as to where she has gotten her information, please let me know if I'm mistaken with mine.
</font>
- <font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">I am divorced.</font></li>
- <font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">My XH's brain injury wiped out his personality.</font></li>
- <font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">The man I married no longer exisits.</font></li>
<font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">
It is better to "lampoon" it on a specific site, rather than go cause havoc on the specific boards.Sure, you are correct. Two points on this one.
One: The way you have stated this makes it seem as if you have a mission. Many of the scarleta posters are not betrayed, just abhor cheating in all forms, so BW or not Dacia of XX (turnabout is fairplay is it not?) has created this site - two of them as a matter of fact - for people such as yourself to express your distaste. Because you must have some outlet for this consuming desire to lampoon the unknown deceiver who dares post on the internet.
And, if it were not for the generosity and kindness of Dacia of XX who with her technical savvy and shrewd thinking - she picks up and logs the IP addresses of those who visit her sites - you would have no outlet for your hatred.
And on Saturdays do you and the kids dress up and stand outside of Planned Parenthood and yell love thy neighbor at girls walking in quite possibly just for a pap?
Two: It is much better to say rotten and nasty things about other people that you don't even know in the privacy of your own home and behind their back than to go into their house and say it to their face with a mask (fake name) on.
I will write that down in my lesson plan book for when I start teaching again. I wonder at what grade level this would be appropriate material. Well, like some subjects, you can never start too soon.
Children, circle time! Crayons in their boxes - papers neatly in your cubbies! Today's lesson is on lampooning. Can we all say that?
Now, there is another issue. On scarleta Bippo, Dacia of XX, and the posters discussed my need for sympathy. Actually, it was what they thought I was begging for. And now Dacia has gone over to TOW since she wasn't successful in getting folks PO'd at me here and is trying to stir things up over there.
I love sympathy. I need sympathy. I thrive on it, I require it, and if I do not get it daily it makes my difficult life even worse. Sympathy is a marvelous thing.
Are you people even aware of what sympathy is?
Although I am starting to tire of explaining big words to you, I'll do it one more time ok? After that you are on your own. May I suggest
www.dictionary.com as a window to always keep open? It is really helpful with the big words. I notice that over on scarleta most of the words are little. It might be an adjustment, but it can be pretty neat.
Sympathy: Mutual understanding or affection. The act or power of sharing feelings of another. A feeling of loyalty; allegiance. Kindness of feeling toward one who suffers.If you have a friend, you have sympathy. So I guess from the way the people at scarleta consider sympathy as such an evil thing they have no friends? Please correct me if I am wrong.
I don't ever think I can remember a time when I have begged for sympathy. I have always had many friends, and even on places like MB I have been quick to make friends - I think a few have responded here somewhere in this thread...
Sometimes I've had a tough time and let my pals know that I'm down and needed a hug, but if that is a sin,
guilty as charged, and I'll do it again. There is nothing like getting a few words of encouragement from people that know what you're going through.
And when my friends are down, I'm on it! I hope they know that I'm there for them. I give (((hugs))) and kisses xoxo, and I even offer to spank them when they're bad <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" /> !
I dunno, I've probably just spend a ton of time typing to myself and the folks at MB. A crabass isn't gonna want to read anything that doesn't matter to them. And the only thing this post is going to be used for by Pearly or Dacia or the scarleta gang of bullies is to disect it and try and turn my words into little tiny quotes to be used to make themselves feel better.
But they won't really feel better, because in the end, the real end - there will be one question.
Were you nice?
Sheryl,
I explained it because I wanted to. I really don't have secrets. I am who I am, and I'm not ashamed. You know that. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" />
Dunno why I never told you bout the twins. I guess it never came up. So Sher, did you get fresh hot popcorn with your videos again <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" /> by the way I have twin uteruses.
Clarkie,
Dacia of XX promised she would take all the posts about me out, but changed her mind once she realized her goonies got the info cause I said I'd show you.
Maybe it's all your fault. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Razz]" src="images/icons/tongue.gif" /> Still, I'll show you if I have to. To me, a promise is a promise. I guess some people see it differently.
Pepper
((((((((((Pepper & E)))))))))))
I'm hugging us both together cause it's empathy!
Mean people suck. I gotta get my first bumper sticker. Always hated them, now I have to have one!
Cali -
Now that I've been outed, do I start wearing womens clothing in public? High heels and makeup too?
Orchid my dear, dear friend,
JTW has been a great help Coming from you that means the world. I have the utmost respect for you, and thing you are just an amazing woman.
All right. It's time to end this long, long post. This may be of record length for me.
Be good to each other!
Love,
E
<small>[ August 23, 2002, 03:19 AM: Message edited by: justthewife ]</small>
