Have been seperated for over a year now, divorce has been in the works for 6 months, still not divorced though.

Haven't had any neew paperwork from lawyer since July 22. Did ask STBX last Tuesday, what was up said he had taken the 7 page document that my lawyer thru in to base legal to see if it was all neccessary, it wasn't (I knew that) but asked if the one thing that we had agreed to was left in tack and said yes. Good!!

The 1st is Saturday, there is no way that the papers can get to me, me sign them and get them to a judge to sign by the 1st which means, another months rent on OW's apartment, $300.
If by some mircle, and it would have to be a mircle at this time the papers are done by the 1st, he would owe me an additional $500 in alimony that is due once the divorce is signed and owes $600 for my lawyers fees. Now my thought is did he figure out that it was cheaper to pay OW's rent then divorce me? Is that the only thing that is holding him back? He told OD that he didn't think that he wanted to marry OW, just wanted to live with her "to make sure".

STBX hasn't spoken to me at all, I did e mail to let him know that we were not traveling over labor day.

Just all kind of confusing and aggreviating to me, he was the one that wanted this divorce, but doesn't seem to push to get it done, and I just set here in limbo. UGH!!!

Dawn <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

Hi Daybreak,
I wonder if the OW knows he doesn't intend to marry her? I mean, she did move half a continent away from her family to be with him. Perhaps he's finding "not being quite divorced" convenient? If he doesn't want to marry her, he can't marry her if he isn't divorced. You are a couple states away, so you aren't in his face, it isn't like he's dealing with you or your marriage daily.

Maybe I'm too Machiavellian. But it does seem odd that something he was pressing for so hard BEFORE she got there isn't something he appears to be pressing his lawyer for now. Maybe just $$$$$ problems?

Lor,

Sorry I missed you yesterday, didn't go to town had staples removed instead!!!

That's just it I don't get it, is he using the not divorced thing to his benefit? Do I need to be in his face more? Or should I go ahead and push the divorce thru? I don't like being in the limbo thing here.

Joelle (OD) was in pressed with your refrence to Machiavellian, I didn't know what you were referring to, she did!

Dawn <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

Dawn,

My STBX hasn't pushed the D & he has been living with the OW since June 2001. I haven't pushed it as I knew it made her mad. However, I finally asked him why he hadn't, he gave me 2 resons: </font>

• <font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">didn't want the conflict with me</font></li>
• <font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">he didn't want the divroced label</font></li>

<font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">So who knows what goes through their minds.