Okay, so at least I'm out of the "Steve Grogan" room! Drove up to <city> where I have my interview tomorrow. I have very mixed feelings right now.

I don't want to get offered the job, because I am feeling very much in love with my W right now (I've been away from home for a whopping 2 days now, and I miss her dearly!).

I DO want to get offered the job, because we have no NC agreement, my W still has "privacy issues" and it's "her turn" to be selfish, I guess (though she doesn't call it that). Plus, if I get offered the job, it gives me a bit of leverage for better "treatment" at my current job.

I DON'T want to get offered the job because we put so much energy into buying that historic home in LA and now we have/get to rebuild it.

I DO want to get offered the job because it is in a region that I always thought I would have wanted to live/work in - just wish the offer had come at least 6 years ago, when I could have uprooted more easily.

On the 2-hr drive here, I was listening to an "oldies" station. They played "Yesterday" which is one of my favorite old Beatles songs. Then they played "Time of the Season" which was another favorite of mine when I was in the 5th grade. That brought back memories of a crush I had on a girl in my class at school. And THAT brought up my early feelings of "new love" I had for my W 28 years ago, and I had this intense pang of regret and loss shoot through me. At least the prozac kept me from crying. But I had to turn off the radio and sing Moody Blues, Peter Gabriel, and King Crimson songs to myself after that. And that helped.

Now I'm in my hotel room. My cell isn't getting signal, and I want to call home (but nobody answered a little while ago). I have to prepare my presentation for tomorrow, and I don't have the energy... ...and yet I do. What the heck?

I could use some support from my friends right now. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Frown]" src="images/icons/frown.gif" />

<small>[ August 29, 2002, 12:25 AM: Message edited by: 2long ]</small>

2L;

It's weird but I get exactly tha same feelings! Listening to the old music, there's songs I just break up with these days...

But you know, we can't live the rest of our lives regretting our errors, or thinking about what could have been, should have been...we did the best we knew how each time, at each turn, and as long as our hearts are in the right place, that is all we can do. Don't beat yourself up over that...no regrets!

As for the job; look you don't HAVE to take it! BUT it IS an option that you will have, and in my book, that is a good thing. You dear W will be with you or she won't, but the job and the move are for YOU. And for her, if she chooses to be with you.

My friend, remember those of us who have no job...that new job just looks a lot better, doesn't it?

2L,

I wish you luck tomorrow...and I don't...I guess....I think. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

Everything will happen as it's meant to.

E_C

P.S. Wouldn't it be alot easier for you if you just took a job repairing fogsucking satelittes? <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

SC:

Well, I disconnected for a time and called the house again.

Had a pleasant convo with my W. We talked about funny stuff (got to LAUGH at our house sitch, it hurts to much to dwell!). Talked about another house we're looking into buying - don't jump on me here... ...we need to move out of this rental in less than 2 months anyway, and we might as well put good money into something we can get an investment return on. The house is also historic, but is a real mess (dirty, not falling apart), courtesy of the previous tenant that had to be evicted. The current owner bought the house on spec, sight unseen. He wants 2much for it, so our realtor is going to try to find out what it's really worth. It's got an amazingly HUGE yard for LA (probably more than an acre), and was divided into two apartments. We'd probably live in one and rent the other, possibly covering a good chunk of the mortgage on it, hence the investment potential. We'd rent the whole thing when we move back into our house.

At the end of the convo, my W wished me good luck for my interview, and I thanked her. Then I told her I missed her (have been cautious about ILY - feeling like she doesn't want to say it herself because of "actions speak louder than words" issues), and she told me, very sweetly, that she misses me too.

Now I'm getting teary again <img border="0" alt="[Teary]" title="" src="graemlins/teary.gif" /> . First time in quite a while.

Anyway, my interview isn't until 10am, so I think I'm going to putz with my preparations tonight, get a good night's sleep, get up EARLY (benefit of the test I was doing last week, I'm still waking up at 3am!), and finish my preparations before heading in for the interview.

Still, it feels weird. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />

EC:

Thanks for your thoughts.

"I wish you luck tomorrow...and I don't...I guess....I think."

Like my favorite quote when I was a teenager: "I know you believe you understood what you think I said. However, I'm not sure you realize that what I think you heard is not what I meant."

"Everything will happen as it's meant to.
E_C"

Thanks. I actually believe this! (atheist and all!)

"P.S. Wouldn't it be alot easier for you if you just took a job repairing fogsucking satelittes?"

Not really. I'm a rocket scientist, not a rocket engineer! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" />

Glad to hear you're feeling better, and got a chance to talk to the W...good luck tomorrow!

Thanques, SC!

I realized, as I was sitting here, that I've been falling down on the job!!! I don't use my "2s" nearly enough. I will endeavor 2 install "2s" everywhere in my text from now on. It's kind of a genetic imperative, don't you think?

I don't want you 2 think that I don't know how 2 substitute "2s" for tos, toos, twos, teauxs, and similar stuff!

Geez, 2Long...This is 2weird!

Is there a correlation between broken M's and job interviews?

The reason I'm asking is this:

My WW walked out on 04/27. I discovered the A 4 days later on 05/01. Just 5 days, yes...5 whole days, I had to travel over 700 miles for an interview. Man...was that a hellacious undertaking!

But...I got through it. 2Long....for those precious couple of hours you MUST only focus on the "job" at hand. Nothing else. You can do it. I did, even though I didn't think I was going to be able to.

Imagine if you will....I was in your very predicament, but had JUST FOUND OUT 5 days before! You think that wasn't on MY mind? Hell...while in the motel for those couple of days (I'll confess...it was a Sheraton...really, really high class) the looks and atmosphere wasn't doing a darn thing for my mental state.

But anyway...Focus. Just for a couple of hours...You can do it. What's the big deal if you DO get the job? You can still refuse it, even days later. Hey...that may be a little crude, but if your M depends on it, you'll just have to tell them to "take this job and shove it"! (Almost NEVER figured out how to get that line in here <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> )

Stay cool and focused....In everything.

HCII

<small>[ August 27, 2002, 11:21 PM: Message edited by: hcii ]</small>

Oh...a couple more things....

Just how screwed up was I? Well....I spent 200 bucks on phone calls to who Spacecase calls BigSis. She helped me keep my sanity. 200 bucks of phone calls in 2 days....Go figure....

In case you're wondering.....Yep...got offered the job. Turned them down, though. Didn't offer enough of the little pieces of green paper....

HCII

hc2 <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

"Geez, 2Long...This is 2weird!
Is there a correlation between broken M's and job interviews?"

YES.

"2Long....for those precious couple of hours you MUST only focus on the "job" at hand. Nothing else. You can do it. I did, even though I didn't think I was going to be able to."

You're right. I have 2 admit, though, that it would probably have been impossible for me 2 do that 5 days after D-day. I was toast for the first 2 months or so. I STILL have a hard time putting 100% in2 my work NOW.

"But anyway...Focus. Just for a couple of hours...You can do it."

I promise!

"What's the big deal if you DO get the job? You can still refuse it, even days later."

Interestingly, I may have several months 2 change my mind. My current job will give me up 2 a year or 2 2 change my mind and come back, if I want 2. And the new job will likely give me a 2ple of months 2 decide on the offer, if it comes, and maybe several months before the start date, if I accept the offer. 2 cool, huh?

"Stay cool and focused....In everything."

I promise 2!

Just thought of something:

Q: What's the opposite of "prozac"?

A: Amateurzac!!! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" />

Although SC would probably have said "Conzac!"

DOH!

<small>[ August 27, 2002, 11:28 PM: Message edited by: 2long ]</small>

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> hc2 </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"><img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

Your problem is that you're 2 damned observant. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

Be thinking of you 2morrow <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

HC2 <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

Re: your interview, good luck! Hope all goes well. At this point in your life, having choices is probably a really good thing. I know it has been that way for us as my wife was interviewing - worked out really well for her and us. Fresh starts can be good, as can the realization that you and your wife want to make another go of the life you've had all along. Either way, it might help put things behind both of you faster.

I know what you mean about the song thing. I was listening to some old Grateful Dead stuff on 8/1 (Jerry Garcia's birthday), having a good ol' time in my family room, when the memories started flooding in about the 30 years I've been in love with my wife, and I lost it. As close to an emotional meltdown as I've ever had. But, in retrospect, a cleansing experience. Not one I'm anxious to repeat anytime soon, though.

Be thinking about you tomorrow.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">I realized, as I was sitting here, that I've been falling down on the job!!! I don't use my "2s" nearly enough. I will endeavor 2 install "2s" everywhere in my text from now on. It's kind of a genetic imperative, don't you think?

I don't want you 2 think that I don't know how 2 substitute "2s" for tos, toos, twos, teauxs, and similar stuff! </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Hey 2Long...

You need MY sig line... <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" />

HC2

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by 2long:
<strong>Just thought of something:

Q: What's the opposite of "prozac"?

A: Amateurzac!!! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" />

Although SC would probably have said "Conzac!"

DOH!</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">2Conzac! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

SISF:

Hi! Thanks for the kind words! You know? I've been "accused" of looking like Jerry Garcia at times, particularly when my hair gets a bit 2long (but it isn't gray, just the beard). AND, I used 2 drive a '67 VW bus. Sold it when I bought a newer one. But I still have my 42 year old VW singlecab pickup, which almost counts! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

I sense my W is thinking a lot about my interview 2morrow. She's being very nice 2 me. I like that. I love her. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Frown]" src="images/icons/frown.gif" /> <img border="0" alt="[Teary]" title="" src="graemlins/teary.gif" />

Boy, hc2! I wouldn't wish your sig line on anybody! Heck, I wouldn't wish MY sig line on anybody!!! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" />

SC:

"2Conzac! "

We used 2 have a 2can at the pet shop I used 2 work at before I met my W. Pretty bird, but NOISY!

Okay, folks! I'm off 2bed! Going 2 stare at my 2 eyelids for a few hours!

Every single BOTH of them!! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />

Okay. Got a good night's sleep. Sucked down one cup of kauphy already, and I'm feeling perky!

Now all I have 2 do is stay off the board and focus on my presentation!

Wish me some more luck, folks! It's going 2 be a long day (interview, lunch, 2rs, dinner, calling W with news of days events... ...posting 2 forum <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" /> ).