Unfortunately, I find myself existing in a perpetual state of "limbo." My WH confessed his A to me 3 months ago. He still lives at home, but he has refused to end his A. He vacillates between wanting to leave and wanting to stay. He says he feels like he is choosing between OW and our kids. I have read more than I imagined possible, so I realize that he does not have loving feelings for me right now. It hurts deeply, of course, but I also understand that we can get back to that point if he will commit to the M and end the A.

OW is a co-worker. Job duties changed recently, and their contact has become much more limited at work. Since I know if the A, it is more difficult for him to find time to spend with her outside of work. I would have thought this would help, but it seems that he is getting sucked in further. He is irritable - says he is tired, but I know it is because he misses OW. It seems that he is leaning more seriously toward leaving - he won't commit to things in the future anymore. He tells me that some days he thinks he wants to leave to be with OW, and other days he wants to stay home and work it out.

Meanwhile, I am doing my best to Plan A. Maybe even over-doing it. His big complaint is that I "hoover" over him too much. But, I just want to be near him.....

Has anyone's WS finally gotten "off the fence"? How did it happen? How long did it take? Which way did the WS go? How did you react?

I could use some input..... we all know how hard this is.

Thanks, WTW