My W and I just got back from a 4 day vacation. I was really hoping that this time alone together would help boost my feelings toward reconcillation but the emotional wall I have constructed kept anything from happening. I am now at the point that I don't trust her at all and don't know how to get past this. She has lied about contact with the OM, lied about her feelings toward him, and lied about her feelings toward me. Not just once, but numerous times. The only way I found out the "truth" was by tapping my home phone and listening to a phone conversation she had with her mother on D-Day #6.
She says he is now done with OM <img border="0" title="" alt="[Confused]" src="images/icons/confused.gif" /> and wants to stay with me. I have had strong urges to contact OM to see if contact has REALLY stopped but resisted this urge...so far <img border="0" title="" alt="[Mad]" src="images/icons/mad.gif" /> The OM would tell me if contact was going on because he told me once that he intended to have her for himself.
So now, without this "verification" (I would make him PROVE contact), I have no way of knowing if contact goes on or not. I told her that I would NOT tolerate a 7th D-Day, but I also said I would not tolerate a #6 before either. My IC convinced me to stop D and give her another chance.
Last year when we went on a 3 day vacation, she moved out the next day. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" /> At that time, I had no idea that OM existed.