Ok, I know it's been over 6 months and the divorce is truly no closer to being done now then it was before.

All delays have been caused by STBX's lawyer (idiot guy).

I guess I am no good at reading the signs as I am to close to the situation. That's why the need of decoder book!!!! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

But got nasty e-mail from STBX today stating that he wants this divorce done by the end of the month and wants to move on with his life, will take it to court if need be and file bankrupcy to pay for it. (Remember I have not caused the delays) And that statement showed up again "I want to move on with my life". I kindly <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> reminded STBX that he did move on with his life, by moving the OW, her sister and child in with him to be moved out and to be moved back in and him to be moved out to someone elses basement. I mean that is moving is it not?

So my question be........is it STBX pushing for the divorce (little action on his part, lots of words) or is it OW and her sister pushing for him to get the divorce done? What do you think? Please, please, please let me know!!!!

Thanks, Dawn <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

<small>[ September 10, 2002, 11:42 PM: Message edited by: daybreak ]</small>

Hi Dawn,

IMHO....... he is being pushed and wants to push you. U gonna let him?

Remember my "I had a dream' story?!?!? OW was pushing the WS for the D. Ws was attempting to push the BS for the D. BS waited until she had a dream.....called the WS at 7:15am with a simple.... 'ok I'm ready' call and hung up.

I told the WS he could have the D but he had to do all the paperwork. I was too tired and busy to be messing with something that was NOT my choice!!!! I told him use the OW to help you fill out the paperwork. OW gave him all the quickie D sites, WS had the book and CD for the forms. Couldn't be easier but you know what he said? "I didn't do the D because it was too hard.' I retorted, no it's not your OW said it was easy.... remember?!?!?! He didn't like those friendly fire reminders. LOL!!!

So my take is to tell the WS ok, you are right hurry up with the D. But let him do all the work. Remember he has a lot of people just waitng to sink their claws into his pocket book. Remind him of that tidbit!!! ! But only if you are emotionally ready to follow through. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />

L.

Dawnie - Orchid is probably right, but I don't think it matters who's pushing whom.

One thing is probably equally right - your H thinks the divorce will solve some problems. In the end, it will simply allow more problems to come to the surface.

Hi Dawn,
I think O is right too. Your H is most likely getting pressure from OW. I don't get why we get blamed for things that are totally out of our control. I mean, he must realize that the delays are being caused by his lawyer. My husband always had a way of blaming me for things that went wrong even though I had nothing to do with it. (which I get reminded of almost daily by my family..ughhh)

BTW, how are you feeling? I hope you are doing well! Take care Dawn!
BH

awwww...the elusive "code book".

I think that they keep it on shelves right beside the "instruction manual" that you should get when you have a baby. You know the one....the one that you beg for when they come in the room...hand you the baby and tell you will be going home now. Wait...you mean I have to take the baby home and do all this myself??? I have not even been given the "instruction manual". You cannot send me home without that manual!!!!!!

I do not mean to be flip...but it sure seems that there are some mighty important books out there that we are not privy to. It must be a conspiracy to always keep us guessing. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />

committed

Hi Daybreak,
He's absolutely free to tell you what he wants...it doesn't make it what you want <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> .

I think I'd just say, "I hear you." You aren't the one causing any delay...YET <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" /> .

I personally think it will be a real mess if/when he has his whole new "grouping" living with him.

As for moving...spinning in circles is also movement <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> .

I Love it, I love you guys!!! Had had a really hard day at school today, got another pissy e mail from STBX and said "you know we can continue the pissing contest, and knock it off, as you will probably win as you are equipped differently then me"

I too was thinking it was OW pushing, oh how I would like to poke just a little bit!!! I so loved hurrican cali!!!

I know that is not right tho and will refrain!!!

Must go, midweek at church and I don't have a lesson completed yet!!!!

I am feeling great have lost 20 lbs in the three weeks since surgery, am able to eat real foods, just small portions and have not been hungary at all!!!!

C ya,
Dawn <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />