As with the topic head line,
I wanted to find out if WH is still with OW bcoz he's been treating me very well and all of a sudden cold to me and didn't spend his free time with me or D. I also find it very suspicious that he told me not to go back home that nite when i was supposed to.(i'm staying with my mum and he's staying alone)
I found pictures of him and a NEW OW kissing and hugging in his bag and used condoms in the bin. So i decided to confront him when he come home from work to put a stop to all his nonsense.Instead,he came back earlier than usual and was with that new OW!
He pretended not knowing me and deny our relationship in front of OW and ran off with her.He told me that we are over! He called after a while and says he wants a divorce (finally) and said he had bear with me for a very long time. He even ask me to leave our house for a while so he could bring her in!!! I said no way!(wat is he thinking)
Anyway, he came back after 3hrs to deal with this properly.Told me that new OW is leaving for her home country the very day and is just visiting for 1 month. He only wanted to chat for an hour and return her stuff when he brought her home.
He said there's no love between us. He would react the same angry way even if he came back alone because i did not listen to him.He's only sleeping around for the women's money!What he is earning at his job is just enought to cover the house bills.
It was only then i found out his most important EN is Financial support which i have not give ever since i stop working in June and it was not included in my Plan A while identifying his ENs.
He purposely left his bills lying around to test if i care and lent him help.
I did not ask him about the bills because i thought it's a LB for him everytime i ask if he's paying his bills.(MY PLAN A FAILED!)
His other complain was that i partied too much and show no respect to him by not obeying him when i ignore his requests that i dun or when he ask me not to go to home and i did.He only told explicitly about this that nite.
I know all this sound really negative...but could it be WH is in withdrawal?
He said the new OW was the sweetest gal he ever met and i had shattered everything because he had hurt her, me and himself felt he lost everything and gave all of us bad memories.
WHY is this OW whom he claims he's not ever gonna see again more important to him than me? He rather hurt me than hurt her?
I don't know how i found the strength to go back to my own home, but i did.I took with me all my belongings and return his house keys to him. I told him i still love him before i left.(i havent told him that since May)
I'm so unsure wat to do now,one moment my heart tells me i want to try again at Plan A, another moment my mind tell me divorce is the fastest way to get out of this misery.
He told him to give him some time to relax and that i should think it through in the mean time.
He's going to work in that new OW's country in November.
- WH also claim that he don't have any other woman now and that the previous OW was not what he expected and he's not seeing her anymore.
- It's the first time ever that he told me he wants a divorce and after he came home, he did not say it again after i ask is that wat he still want.
- I do wish i run straight home after i snoop, but i'm really tired of him seeing woman after woman. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Frown]" src="images/icons/frown.gif" />
-Shall i Plan A again now i know wat his most important EN is? Or shall i separate since he's going away soon? He said his second need is somebody who understands him inside out.
-What are the options available now since i know Plan B is only for active affairs.
- Can i let him read SAA and do the EN questionaire now? I feel that he's confused too and i hope the book can help him and let him see that there's still hope.
I will really appreciate to hear some opinions from mBers and a note to others that make sure that you identify your WS's ENs correctly or u'll be running around in circles. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" />