Hey honey - you have been very quiet - How are things going with your husband after your good weekend last week??? Anymore progress or have things quieted down??? Just wondering??? Mimi

Still progressing with more pleasant conversations... mixed with his erratic behavior as normal... although he is improving towards me. According to him it is GOING TO TAKE AWHILE for me to prove myself normal to him... if I do this... THEN... things will PROBABLY work out.

TIME is the answer.

I am doing WAY better with calling him less.. .we had dinner on wednesday and the kids spent friday and sat with him.

He was upset when the kids left and lb'd me over it. My family was having a bday dinner with my sister and I think he was jealous... In fact he was almost invited, but no one knows what to ezxpect of him and my parents.. .were coming, and particuarly my MOM is MAD MAD MAD at him.. and doesn't quite know how to be nice... so it is better he did not come. My sister was fine with inviting him, but we were worried about MOTHER>

So anyway, he is still having money issues, and wants me to help him with some business... which we used to work together, so I am considering as this would be a BIG LOVE DEPOSIT, and we both would profit .... well.

Anyway, it is very hard to deal with... as I want RECOVERY NOW.... but we aren't there, and werent' there last week later. it was just a nice weekend, with some love deposits on both ends, and now there is a bit more distance.

Hugs and thanks for asking MAW.

i hope you are doing well with your new D. I have already been divorced once and that makes me more reluctant to do it the 2nd time. ALso my h has been the love of my life since I was 16. It is too hard to stop loving him. I am upset at his actions, but that does not make me stop loving him.

Hugs to you, I know you must be going through a hard time.

I am just going to stay patient.

There is no promise of counseling or antyhing.. but we are on the road to proving to each other that we can each be better.

He did say wednesday he knows he can't have a girlfriend anymore. (except me)- he wanted hugs etc. and he loves bieng with the family. It just hurts he does not want to remedy this quicker. He still places much of the onus on me.For those of you who email me... I am online again at home <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> !

Hugs, HONEY

delete- oops double post.

<small>[ September 23, 2002, 02:34 PM: Message edited by: Honey ]</small>

Honey - Well good for you - so you were divorced before - How the heck did you get over it?? That is what I am dealing with - I mean I am ok on my own but every now and then I have a minor meltdown - I mean I love him and I miss him - the person he used to be and not who he is now.. It amazes me that after being with him for 19 years he acts like we were never together... I am just going to let go and not let him have any part of me and see if I can do it.. I know I can make it on my own I am just not sure that I don't want him there in some capacity... Hopefully your husband doesn't get another girlfriend but you know he still has to deal with his demons ... You still sound like me somewhat blaming yourself and just trying to make him happy maybe sometime at the expense of you.... I know how that is I do it all of the time.... My husband would never do the therapy thing - You know he needs it more than anyone - But I know there is nothing that I can do to help him - I have to stop taking care of him at all...And I am done.. I didn't want this divorce - he did and now he has it - I just have to divorce myself from him now.... He didn't want me now he isn't going to get me... Talk to you...