Today was a very bad day for me... Last night I had m HS over to take an emotional needs questionaire and after discussing our answers I discovered our #1 emotional priorities were way different. When I told him that I wanted anwers to why he keeps having affairs he told me that I work too much but he shows no interest in persuing a better paying career to afford afford me quitting or even changing jobs. He doesn't seem to be open to the reality of our lives. All I want to see how serious he is in working our problems out is for him to be completely open and honest with me about what he did to me but he only admits to what I found out on my own. Tonight I was asking our mutual friend who has spent time with both of them about why he himmself is so angry with him and he told me of a night they spent at his place after clubbing together and he saw them both lying together on his couch when he woke up the next morning! This is yet another betrayal and is another example of the lack of honesty my husband has and I'm truly convinced that he will never change and If I take him back he will just have another affair or even worse leave me for another woman in the future! I'm hurting so much because I also see him hurting and wanting to come home to me but he hasn't proven anything to me except that he will never be honest and open with me. My friend also told me he warned him that he sees trouble and my H just blew him off. My H even told me that no one warned him that it was just a mistake and it just happened. His tune is so different now with all the promises he's making, he even promised me he changes his mind about not wanting children and wants to be a father. I love him because we shared 8 years together but his pattern of infidelity is killing me and I can't live in suspicion for the rest of my life and I know that quitting my job won't be an answer either. Is there hope in believing that he can change even though he still won't admit everything to me? I'm hurting so much and he is calling me 10 times a day desparate to convince me he has? Is there a way knowing the truth or should I just give up on him? Someone please give me some insight before I call a lawyer!!!! <img border="0" alt="[Teary]" title="" src="graemlins/teary.gif" /> <img border="0" alt="[Teary]" title="" src="graemlins/teary.gif" />

evasconfused,

Call a lawyer anyway to consult your legal and financial right but do not file ! ... if WH asks about it tell him that you had call a lawyer to consult ... do not lie and do not hide it but do not volunteer the information.

Now the line between "helping" and "enabeling" is very thin line you have to relay on his action and your gut feeling. However please check on "How A should end " ... People could change. ....

Post back for some more questions after you read that section.

-RH-