Just letting you know that after my confession of sleuthing and finding info on OW - my H did indeed connect with her last night online. I kinda figured he would, after all I was the one who re-opened that can o' worms! BUT, for some reason, he didn't challenge her on the "is her husband dead or alive" issue.

At any rate - he was completely honest with me, said he even tried to find a way to record the conversation so I could read it. She was at first pissed off that he had just stopped communication etc, and he told her about the no contact letter which she claims not to have rec'd. but when she started to ask him if he was still drop dead gorgeous etc, etc, he just told her it doesn't matter. (I joked with him about it saying at least she has good taste!! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> )She wanted to tell him what she looked like now...he just said he really didn't want to know and that it didn't matter!! She also said she hadn't gotten over him. He just stopped her then and there, saying he had made the right decision and loved his wife and family.!! She said at least she now has closure. (give me a break <img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" /> )

SO - radical honesty is difficult, but worth it!
If anyone told me 2.5 years ago that I could JOKE about OW with my H I would have never ever believed it. I told my H that his radical honesty meant everything to me! We had a great great talk, moments of true closeness..and...well... <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

I just happened to see this right away (I get some MB time while H is making dinner for us!!!). And yes, you're right... I DO like your story! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

My H and I did some pretty bad stuff online with OW#1. We ended up messing around with her mind a little bit more than we should have. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" /> Oh well... we did stop it when we were getting out of control. It really became quite the addiction!! The loads of new info we had on her was unbelievable!! And we were SO CLOSE to sending it out to unsuspecting 'friends' of hers. But we smartened up, and deleted everything, and let it go to spend time with each other on far more productive ventures. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" /> "Let her continue to burn her own bridges" we thought, b/c I believe wholeheartedly that what goes around comes around.

It is really wierd to joke about the A, isn't it? I never thought I'd be there either. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

Karen

She said at least she now has closure.

I'm getting to feel about this 'closure' stuff as I do about 'soul mates', etc. It's a bunch of tripe.

Thanks guys - I agree about this closure stuff - I mean what is that?
Have to let you know Topie - I took a step I shouldn't have. Found her online again -but she PM's me (him)! At first I pretended to be my H, but then she asked him to CALL her!!! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Mad]" src="images/icons/mad.gif" />
So, I 'fessed up then and there that is was actually me and that H had told me about their chat and that I was curious...She blew me off immediately - saying "same game then, not interested" - whatever that means.
OF COURSE I told H RIGHT AWAY about my stupid actions. (Radical Honesty <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" /> ) He says he's not mad, but I don't think he's thrilled. (He wasn't quite so cuddly last night)He did say he now wonders if she thinks his talking with her was some plot and I asked if it mattered and he said "not really".
Anyway - here I go again opening those cans again!
What the hell is my problem - I have my H's heart and soul back with me and I put a screw into it big time. You're right Topie - it can be an obsession !
So I've apologized for my stupidity to my H.