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Joined: Sep 2000
Posts: 4
Junior Member
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Junior Member
Joined: Sep 2000
Posts: 4 |
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<small>[ March 22, 2005, 10:54 PM: Message edited by: SHeBANG ]</small>
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Joined: Oct 2001
Posts: 2,755
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Joined: Oct 2001
Posts: 2,755 |
No way , does your h know you know? Be careful about telling if you haven't yet that you found this. What a horrid woman, she is not at all respecting his marriage, but attempting to woo him.
I am so sorry you have found this and that you are here. Thread carefully and think through what you will do with this info.
Definitely sounds like a flirty letter designed to let him know she is available and willing if he is.
I hope your husband is too smar t for this.
Hugs, HONEY
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Joined: Aug 2002
Posts: 171
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Joined: Aug 2002
Posts: 171 |
sounds to me like he is offering a bit of friendly support to this individual.
like telling someone that they're "pretty", well, maybe he's just reassuring her that she'll find someone (but not him).
my advice would be to be very delicate, loving, and EXTREMELY subtle with this.
with just this to go on, it's not all that bad. barely merits a "red flag".
hope it goes well with you.
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Joined: May 2001
Posts: 4,297
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Joined: May 2001
Posts: 4,297 |
This woman is way out of line. Sounds like your husand has been mostly resisting her to this point.
How did you come to have this email and does your H know that you have it?
After we know that we may be able to help you more.
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Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985 Likes: 1
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Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985 Likes: 1 |
I would address this immediately and have him send her a no contact letter. She sounds like the type who needs real clear feedback or she won't get it. If you don't address this now, it could very well evolve into something much much worse.
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Joined: Sep 2002
Posts: 72
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Joined: Sep 2002
Posts: 72 |
To answer your question: "yes it smells very fishy" <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> The silver lining is that it sounds like your H is resisting temptation. What to do now? well it depends on your relationship with your H. Plan A anyways <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> . Sounds like he is a good guy trying to help so if you do feel uncomfortable let him know. He can't read your mind ( I get told thia a lot <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> ).
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Joined: Sep 2002
Posts: 252
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Joined: Sep 2002
Posts: 252 |
Oh my gosh...that woman is after him!! I'm sorry, but if a woman wrote that note to my H I'd be livid. Obviously any woman who would write a note like that with all those hidden messages to a married man would have no qualms about pursuing that married man.
My H had a major EA (probably still is) with his boss early in the year. She was having marital troubles and he provided a friendly ear. Six months later it almost turned into (well..they swear almost) a PA and it was one of the most devastating times of my life. It started out innocent, but then after more and more time together grew. She was flattered by a man's attention as she felt lonely and my H was flattered by her being so attentive and interested in his advice.
Put it this way. If a MAN had written this to you..would your H think it was innocent? You need to figure out a way to stop this communication, definitely.
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Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 106
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Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 106 |
SHeBANG - RED FLAG!!!! RED FLAG!!!!
There's no way this is innocent. No way. Regardless of what your husband is thinking this is at this time, this woman is poison to your marriage. In fact, if it wasn't for some of the facts you've given us, I would SWEAR that this could have been written by OW in our situation. The same sort of "stuff."
Just the fact that she says she doesn't want his body is a means to get him to thinking about it. Major Red Flag. She's thrown in a Cosmo reference. Red Flag. The stuff about his voice? This is not friendly banter. Red flag again.
For crying out loud - she's saying that she admitted to being attracted to him, and she's married. And obviously feeling "rejected as a wife." More red flags.
Time to discuss this, I think.
JMHO.
MT
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Joined: May 2001
Posts: 3,303
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Joined: May 2001
Posts: 3,303 |
Hmph, I hope you wrote her back and told her that "this is ___'s wife, and sorry, ongoing dialogue with my husband is NOT a possibility!" You could also tell her that technically he is not rejecting her but YOU are! She's right, she was utterly stupid to tell your H that she was attracted to him. I'm glad you found this e-mail! You can really have some fun... <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />
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Joined: Sep 2001
Posts: 789
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Joined: Sep 2001
Posts: 789 |
I suggest you forward the e-mail to her H. See if he thinks the e-mail is so "innocent".
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