I left a message for my W last night about going to TX to visit our son in a couple of weeks. I was just asking her if the dates were convenient for her. She called me this morning and we spoke for about 1/2 hour. I did my best to be in my best behavior (Plan A) and succeded even after she tried a couple of times to drag me into a discussion.

She has been considering returning to the midwest for a while now. (Of course she's interested, this is where the OM lives). Anyway, she asked me in a way that sounded like she was asking my opinion about their return. I told her I would like to have our son close to both of us but that it was totally up to her since she was now free to make her own decisions. I also told her that I still support that option.

She kept insisting that she wants to live in an area close to the OM and claims that is the best school district. All I said was I've talked to some people and the best school district is elsewhere. I did not assume nor reacted but I am sure she kept insisting because she wants to live closer to him.

Anyway, no talk about the R at all and the conversation was pleasant and we both laughed at jokes from each other. It felt good to not take the bait on those two ocassions but I will say that the bait was not strong so it was easy to ignore.

On another day I will be asking for advice about the visit to our son. Thanks.

bump^

Difficult situation. My sympathies. On the PlanA/B forum aanst is in thw same situation. Reading his thread may help; perhaps post on his thread and start up a dialogue?