Originally posted by Richardheming:
<strong>My wife and I have been split up since july. She has a new boyfriend that she keeps moving in and out of. Last night she moved back in. This is like the 3rd time in 2 months. We talked last night and she said that she didnt want anything to do with me and I asked her why? She said that she is still too emotionally attacted to me. Does that mean that she still loves me? anyone have suggestions on how I can get het back?</strong>
Richard,
U should rename this thread to 'she has lost her mind'. I ask you, do you think your W is speaking logically? This will help you determine which one of you needs help first.
As in the airline safety rules, the parent must secure their oxygen mask first then attend to their child. You are the parent in this case (the sane one), so secure yourself first. Get counseling to learn how to understand the issues correctly and learn how to help yourself and when she is ready how to help your W.
What you posted from your W shows she is babbling. Talking incoherently and making life altering decisions as a result.
Read the concepts section above, see if you can get a local counselor (MC or IC) perferably one familar with MB concepts or even do phone counseling with Steve or Jennifer. It will be real helpful to you.
Right now there may not be much you can do while she is in this confused mental state. Like any virus, it may have to run it's course but the damage it does in the interim is what you may be able to control to some degree.
1. Don't enable her A but giving her everything she asks for. Many a WS will use the BS, family, friends, funds everything to keep the A going. Learn how NOT to participate but still show love.
2. Create your support group, including venting here.
3. Protect your assests.
4. If you have children, protect their interests.
5. Pray for a clear mind and a calm heart.
You are NOT the looney one here but it will sure feel that way sometimes.
take care and welcome to MB.
L.
