What a day. First and formost I would like to thank all of you for the support and feedback. God bless you all and the best of luck to all of you.

So here's my update. Last night I went out wine tasting with a few friends. I'm actually able to relax and have a good time for the firs time in long time. I feel pretty good abut myself. Friends and I decide to come back to my place and continue our conversation. WW calls right as I get home. She says she is bored at work. I said ok and we talked a little. Ten a funny thing happened. She started venting to me about OM.She says she is getting tired of hm being constantly jealouse and complaining about it. She then tells me about how he is buying her flowers only because I bought her some. She then goes o to tell me she istired of him not having a job and the fact that he won't learn a trade. I didn't have the heart to tell her he was too dumb to learn anything. Then she says he has no motivation to do anything. I says yeah I know. I went to high school with him. It took him 5 years to graduate and he never went to college or learned a damn thing. It was wierd hearing her open up and talk about how she was annoyed with him. Then OM showed up at her work and she had to go. I'm thinking positive about this and I hope she does not return to the fog. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

This IS a good sign, but tread softly. Listen to her gripes and complaints, don't add to them. The last thing she needs to be able to do is have a near identical conversation with OM and say, "my H was talking about how dumb you were today." etc. I know it's human nature to chime in and agree with her, even try to open her eyes more, but it looks like the OM is doing that fine on his own. I'd stick to generic responses like, "oh really", "yeah", "hmmm", "well"... Don't LB by running him down to much. Don't you remember junior high (us girls did this anyway). One girl would go talk about another girl to a third girl. And 15 minutes later the #1 girl would be talking to the #2 girl about the #3 girl. Uggh! What a juvenile mess!! I'd advise steering clear of it. Let her rave, but let her do it by herself. Just be her ear.

It does sound like the fog is getting a little thinner though!! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

My XW does this all the time. This sounds twisted but I think her telling me bad stuff about the OM is her way of getting me on her side. After a while you start thinking "then what the hell are you still doing with him".

The next step is "if he is so bad then why don't you come back?" That leads to "you must not want me then."

Be careful. Don't read too much into it and protect your heart. Until she's gone from the OM you really won't know what is going on.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by Moving On With Life:
<strong>Be careful. Don't read too much into it and protect your heart. Until she's gone from the OM you really won't know what is going on.</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">I agree 100% with MOWL.

The best thing you can do is to continue to be supportive but at the same time giving her the impression that you are moving on with your life.

Thanks for the insight. Yesterday went good also. WW had me come bye work to show her what I got our daughter for her birthday. I said ok and went over. I was there for about a hour talking with her. The whole time all she did was talk about how much of a loser OM was. She then told me she didn't care if it worked out between her and OM. I wanted to scream THEN COME HOME AND LEAVE HIS SORRY GOOD FOR NOTHING STUPID A$$. But I didn't and just said well I'll be here for yu if you need me. One thing I did not like was she was excited about a house she wants to rent. I'm kinda put off by this. She can not afford it right now so I'm hopeing OM will stay unemployed for awhile. Then I had to leave OM showed up again. He is really starting to annoy me when he does this. He was pissed as usual about seeing me there. oh he went in and LBed I'm sure. Right before I left she told me she would call me when he left. Guess what he never left. He spent 6 hours hanging around a gas station. Is this the sign of a scared man? I thnk he did it on purpose. I do know WW was not happy about. She calle to ask abou me dropping off our daughter and I was able to find out she wasn't happy by asking generic yes or no answers and the tone of her voice. She called two or three times while he was there. She always asked questions she already knew the answers to. oh well. Gotta go daughter is up. let me know what you all think.

You are a winner no matter what the outcome of your M will be IF and only if you continue to keep your wits and not persue her.

If your perception of their R is correct, you should be seeing some pretty interesting fireworks as their A starts to reach critical mass.

Hold your tongue and continue to reep the rewards.