Hey 2 long, just a note from your ole sis here. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> I hope you keep posting because it seems to be the only way I hear from you! (Sort of) <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" /> ...kidding...
Really, your humor always give me a boost. Always has. And I deeply admire the profound thinking and growing you are doing. You are an inspiration to me. Keep working. What you are doing for yourself is gold.
I haven't checked a lot lately, but wanted to show my support. I love you so much, and love your W dearly and would sorely miss her if you parted. If you looked back at your postings, you would see how strong you are...and how entertaining! Keep on, but do what you need to also to keep sane.
I'm not waxing eloquent, not even funny, but the heart's here.
And to your buddy Spacecase, hope he's doing ok also. I've got bigsis hugs enough to go around, so I'll adopt him if he needs.
Hugs to all!
And darn, I do have this priceless photo of a toddler bitty 2long in the mud with a muddy face from all that dirt-tasting. I mean to have a student aid help me scan and send it to you for all to see somehow because I don't have all that modern stuff on my old computer...but darn, if I haven't stashed the photo someplace safe...from me, apparently. I'll find it someday...

2long, Just wanted to wish you well... I am glad your recovery is progressing and you can see the forest for the trees- I apologize I did not read the whole thread as I am on my way to work out this early am for me... might as well get in some exercise while I am up! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />

I am so glad the spirit of mb is helpling your marriage, by u helping yourself.... to rebuild the love in your relationship.

Hugs, HONEY

Hi 2long,
One of the reason your friends don't post to you all the time is that they think you are doing so well that you don't need the attention. As you can see, there are a lot of people that care about you.

I think I understand how you are feeling. Could be better, could be worse, but not dead yet.

So what magazine do you take to keep up on astronomy, or do you just do the math yourself?
Or perhaps you are the one that writes the articles for the magazine?

I had a telescope for a while but it was not a good one and I gave it away, I suspect it would take real money to be serious about it. I was frustrated trying to find things with a cheap scope. ( It was a fathers day present so I didn't have much say in it.) It is kind of fun to show people the rings of Saturn and the moons of Jupiter but I couldn't have seen enough detail to see what you are trying to observe.

Does W ever go out with you and look at the sky?

SS

Thanks, folks!

Thanks, everybody that I didn't respond 2 yes2rday (or yet 2day), been busy, and all.

Thanks, bigsis! I got your email, but was out of town and hand-holding a bunch of engineers (sorry, JL, but they really are lost out in the REAL field! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> ), so I forgot 2 reply.

SS: Drop me an email, if you want some pointers about scopes? No big deal if not.

Yes, my W used 2 go with me when I'd go on monthly "star parties" but that pretty much stopped over 15 years ago. The whole family used 2 go on annual trips I still make, but the kids didn't go for the first time this year, and I didn't bring a telescope 2 the event (first time in 23 years!). My W and MIL showed up for a day, though, and that was nice.

I almost got the scope out this am for the occultation, but we've got Santa Ana winds going on for the next several days probably, and I wouldn't have seen much.

<small>[ November 20, 2002, 10:04 AM: Message edited by: 2long ]</small>

SS:

Oh, and "Sky and Telescope" is the rag 2 read! And, no, I don't write for them (but I have been written about in them). No more hints!

<img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />

2Long,
I'm a newby here as far as posting goes, although have been reading these threads since D-Day, July 1.
I have to say that your posts and story have given me a lot of inspiration when I've felt down and like giving up.
I'm in plan A now, although my H said he wanted out last week and may be filing in January. He is in very deep with OW who is also filing soon. So, my situation isn't very encouraging, but it's coming here and reading about other situations that help me stick it out.

So please, don't stop posting...I think you have done a great job and are a wonderful example of the time and patience it takes to work through this stuff. I just hope I can keep it up as well.

2L ... went to Bob's BigBoy last night .... WITHOUT MY WALLET!!! Discovered this factoid during our meal. oops. They took my check ... without ID ... I offered to ransom one of the 13-year-olds for the check ... but they turned me down.

Did you know, that Bob's has "Classic Car Night" every Friday??? You ought to take you classic car there with the family for a burger shake and fries. Also, they still offer car-hop service on weekends!!

Cool daddy-o

Pep

<small>[ November 20, 2002, 10:53 AM: Message edited by: Pepperband ]</small>

I just had a convo with a mu2al friend of ours. And you know what occurred 2 me? I woudln't be surprised if this "resolves itself" imperceptably. By that I mean, we're clearly getting closer and happier, in spite of all the house woes (we may have 2 sue, now). I wouldn't be surprised if we find ourselves with "closure", having rebuilt our M (whatever that is) and completely unable 2 remember when the transition occurred.

I have almost brought this one up to you a time or two. (that's 2 2 you.)
Some people need an event to be able to go on, like NC. Can you go on with things getting just a little better each month....... for years?

I think you can, just wondering what you think.

SS

<small>[ November 20, 2002, 03:32 PM: Message edited by: still seeking ]</small>

Hey Pep,

How come you always seem so happy?
Just wondering if it can be duplicated by mortals.

SS

SS:

For years? Gosh, I don't know.... ...on the other hand, I never would have guessed I'd go on this long (2long, in fact), and I have!

I think the point is, and that you're alluding 2, is that, in the long haul (the 2long haul?), it won't matter.

Yeah, I guess I think it's possible 2 carry on and let things improve without ever making a single ultimatim. Whether I can do it or not, I can't say (and won't presume 2 be able 2 evolve that rapidly), but I sure hope so.

2long, sometimes I feel the same way, I post and not a lot of people respond, but it does help to read others posts. My first d-day was actually in sept. 01, and then the major blow out d-day was dec 3rd 2001. That's when I got into e-mails and found out it had never ended and how intense it really was. So that is coming up quickly too and since he is out of the house it will be a strange holiday season. We've never been apart for the holidays since we met, 26 yrs ago, but I am trying to stop controlling everything. Trying to plan A agin, I also love him very much and won't do this forever, but I can't give up yet. Keep posting, it's nice to see a guy who is patiently or not! waiting for his wife. DBD

SS: Oh, and Pepper SEEMS happy because she IS happy!

And no, we mortals CAN'T do that! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

Thanks, HMB and DbyD, I'll stick around!

2long,

Sometimes I find that some of the things you write hit so close to home that all I can do is to sit by myself and quietly weep, because I know how you feel. I’ve seen your inspirational wisdom eloquently written in humorous fashion and wonder what it is I have that I can offer to you. And I look at the length of time I’m been here on this forum and see myself looking for mentors like you and Chorus. As any words of wisdom and comfort I would have to offer would only have echoed those who have already given you comfort.

But 2long, until you reach the gates of heaven, I don’t think you will ever realize how many people you have touched here. So with that I will offer you what little I have.

My D-day anniversary was last Sunday. I too see some positive changes in W for our M. I asked someone to pray for me last Sunday because of what it was and meant to me. She told me, what it really meant was, a year after that dreadful day, I was still married to the woman I fell in love with and that Sunday should be a day of testimony and deserving of celebration (even of my W didn’t understand or remember the significance of it). So it was and I did.

I hope the same for you when your anniversary arrives.

God bless you 2long. Because you still have many to bless here.

Aloha,

S&C

??? Hmmmm??? Maybe I'm not really happy .... maybe it's just gas <img border="0" title="" alt="[Razz]" src="images/icons/tongue.gif" />

Yeah, God bless you 2long. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />

He probably will, probably will.

SS

Pep, Probably is gas, whats the penalty for breaking in to a dentists office?

SS

Okay, OT:

But if you're anything like me, and you watch the clock 2 much, this'll cure ya!

http://yugop.com/ver3/stuff/03/fla.html

Hey 2 ~

I don't respond to ya because you seem to be pretty much on track. You aren't a whining victim, you are choosing your situation, you've accepted your wife, as she is, and made a decision to love her anyway (with no whines like: what about MY needs?!?) You've let go, and you are enjoying what each day offers, and most importantly, enjoying what your wife does offer, instead of complaining that it isn't enough and demanding more. You've also pretty clearly defined for yourself what you need and where your boundaries are. The part that was the most telling was where you said you'd always love her, but that didn't mean you were always going to live with her.

Not much I can add to that. You are doing well.

Hey 2L; thought I'd drop in and say hi...you are doing well, you know it and you feel it. We all feel it. Just keep going; remember things are as they should be.

I have to thank bigsis for her sisterly hug and love, which I will gladly take as I am sister-less, and this is a time in my life when a bigsis would be most, most welcome! Thanks darlin'! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />

Oh, and Pep, well, that's easy; remember that all-girls party she told us about a few months (weeks?) back? If I had one of those per year I'd be "Mr. Happy" too! Luv ya Peppy! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />