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#1041788 11/21/02 10:28 PM
Joined: Nov 2002
Posts: 33
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My husband confessed to having an affair with our secretary about 2 months ago. He says he doesn't love her just has strong feelings for her. Says he loves me but not in love with me. We will be married 5 years in January. Have 1 child with second due in January. He has told me he quit talking to the other girl. This is the third time he supposedly broke it off with her so I don't have much confidence that he really did, we'll see. Anyway, my problem is that he can't show me any affection. Hand holding, hugging stuff like that. If we brush in passing he practically pulls away. I feel like I'm the won who had an affair. I worry that this is a sign that he has not really committed himself to working things out. Does anyone have any comments or suggestions? I would appreciate anything.

#1041789 11/22/02 05:15 AM
Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 1,465
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Hello and Welcome to MB,

I don't know much about your situation. Since you are "new" to this terrible situation, there is alot that you can do to save your marriage.

Please read all that you can on this site that relates to Infidelity. Educate yourself. Seek to understand. It is critical.

Seek counselling with Steve or Jennifer Harley. Is your husband open to the concept of counselling?

Take care and keep us posted.

#1041790 11/22/02 05:16 AM
Joined: Feb 2001
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By the way, what he's saying to you is definitely "normal" for a WS who is in the dreaded "FOG".


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