Thought I might post a line or two....

Doing rather well. Got the house construction started, and wishing it was going faster than it is.

I have recovered from the DV rather nicely. One strange thing, though. I am just now beginning to see and realize that a lot of MY needs were not being met in my marriage. Seriously...I was "deprived" in a few ways. Meaningful conversation, appreciation, etc. to name a few. I am beginning to get pieces of those, and it really feels good. I know this is MB, but...I am beginning to wonder if my M was really worth saving.

OK...Some VERY good news, or at least I think so...

After 25 years, I can now officially sit in the "non-smoking" section! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> That's right, y'all. This dude ain't had a smoke in a week. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

Life ain't all that bad.

Boo

Sounds like a lot of positive things going for you right now. I'm so glad for you - it's YOUR time now!

And congrats on the smokeless thing - I'm sure you'll stick with it. After what you've been through, that oughta be a piece of cake!

Interesting thought about your needs. I'm now beginning to see that in my situation as well. I just started going to IC (same one as my W's, so she can get the whole picture). She picked up on the needs theme (mine) right away.

Keep up the good work on yourself, Boo. Nice to know that life can be enjoyable no matter what.

WTG boo!!!

I was a smoker throughout my late teens and 20's. I have been smoke-free now for 13 yrs and let me tell you...It Feels WONDERFUL!

Keep it up boo. It's a nasty, dirty, expensive habit that you won't miss one bit. And get this...You will be able to taste food again. Just you wait. Food will have never tasted so good. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" />

Big Thumbs Up!
ba109

Hi hcii!

Good 2 hear from you again. Good 2 hear the construction is starting! (bet you'll get your new house finished before our old one is habitable again!!!).

Have a happy Bird Day!

Remember this .... kissing a non smoker is a joy and a pleasure <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Cool]" src="images/icons/cool.gif" />

HCII, congrats on the smoking! You are past the hardest part. What an accomplishment. I quit 4 years ago and it was the best thing I did for my health.

Boo - congrats on the whole picture!

I'm with you on the realization of needs not met. To be honest, I knew a lot of my needs weren't being met for a lot of years - but due to the other complications in our family, I assumed it was a part of the bigger sacrifice.

Now, in hindsight, it was worse than I knew at the time. I still would have liked to have a chance at restoring our relationship because it WAS good at one time. But, like you, there is now new "construction" in my life and I bet we're having similar feelings.

Allow me the observation of a parallel in giving up an old habit.

Dave

Hey Boo!

Happy belated Turkey Day! I was wondering how things were for you. I'm glad to see that you are Happy.

CONGRATULATIONS on kicking the habits. I think that it is an absolutely wonderful thing for you to be doing for yourself.

It sounds by your retrospect that you are truly starting to understand yourself. I think that as time goes on, you will discover many more little details that you couldn't see while you were in that situation. Some wil be painful, others will be liberating. Regardless, this is the path to closure. You're on your way!

Best to you,