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Happy birthday to one very cool lady!! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Cool]" src="images/icons/cool.gif" /> Be sure to wear your tiara to lunch today ... YOU'RE THE QUEEN FOR A DAY <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />
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Happy Birthday - Susan <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> - Today is my birthday too !!!
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HaPpY bIrThDaY mAw 64dododododo You say it's your birthday it's my birthday to yeah we're gonna have a goooood time happy birthday to you <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />
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Well Pepperband - thank you very much !!!! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />
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Happiest BDay Susan and MAW (fellow Sagg's)!!!
Tomorrow is my and AZ Allison's BDay .... she is wayyyyyyyyyy wayyyyyyyyyy wayyyyyyyyy older than me tho. Hee hee
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Well then Happy Birthday Resilient and AZ Allison - Now you don't get Birthday Presents wrapped in Christmas Paper do you?????
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What a COMPLETE SURPRISE! Thank you! And Happy Birthday to you too Maw64. I hope it is a good one. If that "64" has anything to do with your age, I am MUCH younger than you...HA... just turn it around and add a year! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Cool]" src="images/icons/cool.gif" /> PS...Pepper, last night my husband asked if there was anything else I wanted for my birthday (I already have my gift). I said, "oh no, I really have more than I need and I am so grateful"... He was already in the bed and I was in the bathroom brushing my teeth. I heard him chuckle...and he said "you have been reading too much of that... what do you call it???.... Marriage Builders?" I'm working on my attitude of gratitude thanks to you! I guess he noticed the change. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" /> My mother called to tell me Happy Birthday too. I didn't answer the first time...guess I was drying my hair or in the shower. The second time she said "Oh, when you did not answer, I thought maybe H was sick and you were at the hospital" <img border="0" title="" alt="[Confused]" src="images/icons/confused.gif" /> Hubby is healthy as a horse...wonder why that comment...where does she get that???? Guess it is just the negative pattern thinking the "worst". She made a couple of negative comments (probably not intended...just habit) and I thanked her for wishing me a happy birthday and told her I loved her. How's that? <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />
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</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">(fellow Sagg's) </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">uuuummmmm...can I ask...what is a Sagg...just wondering if I should be PROUD to be one.. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />
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Susan - "64" is the year I was born - I am 38 years old today - and the fellow - Sagg's got me for about 1 minute - I am thinking it would be referring to our zodiac sign - "Sagitarius" - Get it..... Hope you are having a great day - Mimi
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Whoops! Sorry to insult you. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Embarrassed]" src="images/icons/blush.gif" /> In that case I am: Susan55. ugh! hum....Sagg's...why didn't I think of that.... Guess I am showing my age...I don't think real fast anymore. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> Happy Birthday you young thing! I was born before The Dead Sea was even SICK! <small>[ December 04, 2002, 02:10 PM: Message edited by: Susan ]</small>
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Susan - I was not insulted - and about the Sagitarius thing - I think it came to me a little quicker because I was just recently divorced so I tend to read my horoscope - you know in search of a better life - always wondering if today is the day.... You are not old by anymeans... Have a great day... <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />
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Susan, if you want to drive a grumpy person nutz:
Be relentless in your exuberent happiness and good cheer!
Be unflappable!
Verbalize all the optimistic thoughts you can possible think of.
Pretend everything negative she says to you is a compliment, and respond accordingly. ("Thank you for caring")
Remember, you do not own her feelings. You can care for her, and remain apart with your feelings.
Negativity is contageous. Innoculate yourself with a joy vaccine, and you'll develop immunity!
Happy Birthday Dear Susan the beautiful and the brave!
Pepper
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Gosh Pepper! You amaze me!!! </font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> Negativity is contageous. Innoculate yourself with a joy vaccine, and you'll develop immunity! </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">So true...that is why I really don't like to be around her or talk to her that much. It drags me down. But, I know it is my mother, and that is not the solution. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Confused]" src="images/icons/confused.gif" /> You are one smart lady! Thank you for all you do for us at MB!
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</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Remember, you do not own her feelings. You can care for her, and remain apart with your feelings. </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Im my deep soul searching and peeling away the layers, I think this is the key for me.
I have NOT figured out how to remain apart with my feelings. I start and go with grand plans in my head, knowing what to expect. But, it ALWAYS gets to me and I end up feeling hurt and raw and wounded and get grumpy!
<small>[ December 04, 2002, 04:02 PM: Message edited by: Susan ]</small>
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"I really don't like to be around her or talk to her that much. It drags me down."
THAT'S why I suggested using the US mail.
You actually love your mother a lot ... did you realize that? Why not "Plan-A" your mother? LOL!
Pepper
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</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">You actually love your mother a lot ... did you realize that? Why not "Plan-A" your mother? LOL! </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">I guess I don't realize it. When I think about her, I think my "love bank" is almost empty...and I almost want to "plan B" her... <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" />
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Susan ... the guilt (Plan-B your mother) would eat you alive and spit you out!!! Then you'd be a wet wad of chewed up guilt on the floor. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Razz]" src="images/icons/tongue.gif" />
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</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Then you'd be a wet wad of chewed up guilt on the floor </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">I guess you are right. My sister called tonight It never ends. I absolutely hate Christmas. It is He@@ every year. She said my mother was asking her if I have mentioned when we are coming. I told her that we would love to have them all come here. Of course they can't do that. Then my sister proceeds to tell me that I should call my mother and tell her to have her (my sister) bring her half way and me meet them half way and then my mother could spend Christmas with me...."then" she said "at least she could not say you did not invite her".... Well, I already did invite her when I said that I wished they would all come here! It will be something constantly or somebody mad or trying to control something from now until who knows when. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Mad]" src="images/icons/mad.gif" />
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Do you play a musical instrument Susan?
Do you know about brain pathways? When a pianist becomes very good, it is because a brain pathway has been established by years and years of practice. The brain takes over automatically, and the pianist doesn't have to "think" about playing .... more like let go of consciousness and let the neuronal pathway move her fingers on the keyboard.
We develop brain pathways that give us an automatic emotional response .... like you do when you hear your mothers voice. If you hear her voice, your brain chemicals respond in their "usual" way ... and your emotional response is pre-determined.
You can use your conscious mind to change the response. it almost "hurts" at first, and feels like you're walking with your shoes on the wrong feet ... but, you can create a different neuron pathway response .... with practice.
Pepper
<small>[ December 05, 2002, 10:34 AM: Message edited by: Pepperband ]</small>
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</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Do you play a musical instrument Susan </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Does a radio count? <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> Thanks. Good food for thought!
You will be proud. My mother called AGAIN this morning. Started talking about ALL of that again...Christmas.
I remained composed. I offered to drive half way and meet her (my sister could bring her half way). She said "oh that might be too much trouble"... I said "well, I will do it." Told her she was welcome, this weekend, Christmas, or anytime. Now, I figure it is her place to accept if she wants me to come and get her. I should not have to keep on insisting that I will or that it is not trouble.
I ended by saying "everyone will have to work out what they want to do and what is best for them, but everyone is welcome to come here".
I did get my position straight that I would not be going back to her house before Christmas, so that is no longer a question.
Ended by telling her I loved her.
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