I had a session with Jennifer last week and she recommended that I do Plan A for two more weeks and then implement Plan B.

I feel my Plan A has been far from perfect, however I have noticed that my W has noticed a change in me (we're only communicating over the phone) and has responded somewhat to them (although not consistently).

Since last Saturday I have implemented Plan A to a tee. I know it is only a short time but it is the first time I have felt proud of my Plan A. Monday morning W asked me that if we were to work on the M and it didn't work would I finally accept it? I am still puzzled by this question. We spoke again Monday night and Tuesday night; brief conversations but very pleasant.

I'd like opinions about prolonging Plan A now that I feel better about sticking to it. I will also ask Jennifer (my appt is next Monday) but would like to hear from all of you. Her A, even at a distance, has become stronger after they spent Thanksgiving weekend together but she's not as accusing as before and is being more pleasant. I don't want to get my hopes up but what if she's starting to notice the effect of Plan A and I would prematurely implement Plan B?

Thanks.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> Monday morning W asked me that if we were to work on the M and it didn't work would I finally accept it? </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">By working on it does she mean that she would end the A and actually work on it?

My take: Follow Jennifer's advice, and if you continue to see real improvement maybe re-evaluate, but also take a hard look at how YOU are doing emotionally.

JMHO <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

^

If she's serious about "working on it" and not just looking for a way to say "I tried and it didn't work" then she'll agree to do what is necessary to truly and honestly work on it. That should look somewhat like this. 1. No contact that she willingly agrees to and a letter to OM that you see and send 2. Access to any and all passwords for cell phone and computer. 3. Agreement to spend a set amount of time together to rekindle and rebuild the love that's been lost. 4. Agreement from her to be willingly accountable for time and money.

If she's not willing to give and negotiate in the process of "working on it" she's not likely serious about actually wanting to make it work. She has to want to make it work, it has to be her choice. If she's half heartedly trying in an attempt to help you "get over it" it will only further your pain and prolong your suffering. Make sure she's serious or continue on your road to Plan B. Remember, you're human,it's next to impossible to do a perfect Plan A when you are in so much pain. Don't beat yourself up about it.