And I am very very angry about it. Not angry at him, angry that some ***** called him. He said he figured someone was joking around. The message was essentually" Hi Chris, this is leslie, I had such a great time with you the other night. Can't wait to see you again!!" and then he said he heard a 'was that good enough?' right before she hung up.

so i looked up the only suspicious phone number on the cell phone. The only people that have his number is work and his students, so they were easy to pick out. The one that seems suspicious was for a local community collage.The phone calls from his students around the suspicious call were all accaountable( one was after a snow storm, do we still have to muster) or too long ago to be suspicious.

So all night I thought about it. All night I went over in my mind calling this number and speaking to "leslie". Now that I know where the number is from, I am curious to see if 'Leslie' works there.

Now as the ws , I am feeling a little weird here. i know my dh has eitehr been at work, or with me, although we all know how easy it is to 'sneak around'.

Then I think , the only people that know number is work and students. COuld it have been a person from work playing tricks on him? OM works with H, would he think its funny to make me think my H was having an A?Should I ask OM if this is the case?

and of course there is in the back of my mind, the nagging thought that H might even possibly be having a A of his own. I can't belive it, but it naggs at me. I am insecure, and insainely jealous. And trust me if I get a hold of a Leslie at that number I will rip her a new @sshole and make sure she knows her life is in danger if she EVER contacts me H again!

Any thoughs?

Euphoria,

COuld it have been a person from work playing tricks on him? OM works with H, would he think its funny to make me think my H was having an A?

I think that could very well be a possibility. I think that the OM is upset for breaking it off with him. They will do anything that they can to get back into your lives. Your insecurity IMVHO comes from what you remember about being a WS yourself. But, your H came to you and told you about these messages and that in it self shows you that he isn't having an A.

Indy

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Should I ask OM if this is the case? </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">NO CONTACT WITH OM!!! It doesn't matter if there's an excuse for you to contact...if something needs to be handled with the OM, let your H, the OM's co-worker deal with him.

I couldn't determine if your H told you about the call, or you heard it, but as Indy says, if your H told you, then it probably is nothing.

If your H hasn't been missing, and your gut feels ok about his actions, then file this away under "strange". If the strange file starts to fill up...then you worry. I wouldn't try to track down Leslie, but I would keep that number and watch for it.

Go ahead and communicate to your husband that you feel insecure and jealous. BSs tend to have had a severe blow to their self-esteem and he may like hearing how you value him.

JMHO...I believe you're blowing this all out of portion because of your sensitivity to having been a WS and your H a BS. We do tend to see "evil intentions" where there are none.

Yes, there could be the possiblity that someone, whoever it might be, is out to cause real problems between you and your H. But crank calls are nothing new. What would have been your reaction to this phone call IF an affair had never touched your lives? Would you have laughed it off as a childish prank?

btw...did you get to listen to this voice message, or did your H delete it and only tell you about it? IF he did...ask him to be sure to save any others which might surface so that you both can listen closely to what was/is said and have proof if needed that he is being harrassed.

IF...you've had suspicions that your H is being unfaithful BEFORE this call, then discuss this with H. IF...you think it may be all "made-up" by H in an effort to get your suspicion and jealousy in a uproar...this too should be discussed with H.

Until there is more calls which YOU get to hear then I would chalk it up to childish behavior and ignore it.

IF there are more calls...then you and H need to do some investigative work to discover who is making them.

DO NOT CONTACT OM ABOUT THIS!!! If you're in NC...do NOT break NC for any reason!!!

For now...accept that it's a crank call...if it's not....deal with it by finding out who is doing it, get the phone company involved, and put a stop to it by legal means. It's still against the law to harrass by phone.

Make this a joint problem to be overcome by you and H if it continues. Don't allow it to divide you.

euphoria. You said students? High school, college? If either of these, students are famous for plaing pranks, even cruel ones!
You need more info before going off on H. I think the fact he told you is proof he knows not who this is or hasn't been messing with said person.
Get more and just watch. Keep on until you find you where this location is. Dorm? house, apt. work?
Run the list before being sure.
God bless, LouLou

They are just out of boot camp, in the Marine Corps like less then 12 mos, so most are 19 years old, his students.

He did tell me about it when he got home from picking a freind up at the airport.

We talked breifly about it. Mostly I just wanted to talk about it. It just really pissed me off and part of me was thinking *if* there was even a remote possiblity of anything going on I was DAMN sure not going to sit back and do nothing, which was how H reacted to my EA.

He deleted it with out me hearing it, I will ask him to let me hear it together with him, if it happens again, great point!

He did feel like he had to defend himself and i tried to explain that it was because I was insecure , not that I automatically thought he was up to something.And that it made me angry that some one would do this. He felt it was a joke, but IMHO if so then the jokes on me because it was obvioulsy done so that I would find it and get angry at Chris.I do feel like if I can have an A ANYONE CAN! Even though he swears up and down he would never ever do that to anyone( have an A) , not even OM. Maybe I don't trust him because I still don't trust myself?

My gut tells me my H is truthful.