How do I have a non LBing dialog with WH or is he FWH (when does wayward husband become former wayward husband? That might should be a separate question.) Anyway....

How do I have a non LBing dialog with H about financial difficulties we are having? He is not paying bills on time? The money is there. He just doesn't pay on time. (I think it is a weird form of rebellion.) Hardly a day goes by that a creditor doesn't call. Everytime the phone rings, I feel sick.

What he has said in the past is, "Well, why don't you take care of it?" I don't think I could straighten out the mess he has made. We have been in this shape since his first EA years ago. He took a substantial pay cut. When we relocated. He waits until a bill is 2 months past due then pays a lot on it.

I'm no financial advisor, but there has to be a better way.

When I say we need to pay so and so, he says," Well, we'll have to wait until next week." When next week comes he says the same thing.

He has ruined his credit and mine.

Thanks for any suggestions,
landslide

Tell the creditors that he handles all the payments and give them his phone number at work.
If he has to deal with them, perhaps he will do something.
In other words, there is no reason for you to accept the consequences for what he is doing, let him take them himself.

SS

I would sit down and talk to him about it without disrespectful judgements or angry accusations. You can't stop discussing important matters for fear of lovebusting; you just do it in a respectful, NON-PATRONIZING manner. [I personally think patronizing is a HUGE love buster and I see alot of people do that here] If he is not handling the bills properly, why don't you offer to take it over? Something has to be done to resolve the problem so I would come prepared to discuss solutions, starting with learning to live within your means.

<small>[ February 12, 2003, 05:34 PM: Message edited by: MelodyLane ]</small>

Thanks still seeking and MelodyLane,

I will talk to H this week-end. Your comments will help. Just feels like walking on eggshells sometimes.

Going to read up more on disrespectful judgments, too.

Thanks again,
landslide