JustLike - I was there many times. The tears just don't seem to stop do they? You just seem to have this lump in your throat, and it won't slide down. Seems that your mind is going so fast, and you can't keep up with it, and you feel dizzy. Been there, and occassionally still am there. But when one tells you it gets easier, it does. I am finding that out now. It has taken me over a year to close to 2 years. But now I can see that I am getting stronger.
I have three people besides my family, and my husbands mother, that believes in me. My psychologist, and my counselor at First Step, and my chiropractor/doctor, who is treating me for my neck and shoulder and back. This suupport system has really been helping. And First Step, with the group session has been wonderful.
This is where I wish my husband would attend the 12 step anger program. I asked him, but he won't. So there are those of us who want help, and those of us who think we are okay. I am of the first. Cause I know I am not okay. And I know that I could be a better person.
I met someone at Walmart a few days ago. We talked, prayed right there in Walmart. My God, I said when I was walking to my vehicle, God is sending me someone all the time. I felt light, and airy, after the prayer.
Thank you Lord, for sending me special people that make me feel good about myself. I know that my husband doesn't feel anything about me, doesn't show me anything special. So thank you for his mother, my family, these special people that you sent, and the person at Walmart, and the church people I have started praying with. Thank you, Lord. Please Lord, show my children that church is important, and that God is important, show them that you Love them Lord, I have asked them to attend church, no they will not attend. Their father will not attend, I asked once, and will again. Just don't know when.
We are no longer a family, we are split up and this is hard. Pray for us Lord, and help us, and help my husband see that he needs counseling.
