I have been married for nearly 20 years. My wife and I were teenagers when we married. Over the course of our marriage, I have been unfaithful 2 time. My wife found out about my affairs, and we sought numerous counselors. It's been 4 years since my affair. But my wife has not forgiven me. She still holds the affairs fresh. Now, she has feelings for a 20 year old. She has not physical contact with him, other than dancing in a musical. He consumers her thoughts, and she has been very honest. She says she wants him, but will not break our committment. She continues to go to school with this young man, and has started working out, tanning, and dressing very seductive. She says I should wait for her as she waited for me during my affiars. I am at a loss. She does have 3 woman that she communicates her struggle to, but they advise her to win this battle, i think she should run, please offer any advise.

You may wish to go to the emotional affairs board and look up the old posts from fireman. His story was just like yours. He had two previous affairs and later his wife said that he should wait for her like she did for him when she started getting involved with someone else. He kept writing that he thought this was fair so he accepted everything concerning her affairs. He is now divorced. It sounds like it will be a matter of time before it becomes physical. Burying your head in the sand and accepting this will do nothing but enable her to have the affair and your marriage will never be the safe. Get into marriage counseling now before it is too late.
No consequences to her actions equals no motivation to change. I wish you luck.