Eleanor,
Me and my wife attended a Retrovaille week-end this past October. We also attended the nine follow-up week-ends. Now we attend bi-weekly sessions known as CORE (Continuing Our Retrouvaille Experience).
Have you visited
Retrouvaille.com ?
First of all I am a cradle Catholic. My wife converted from a fire & brimstone faith. Sharing the same faith has been a big plus. We regularly attend church but would not say that we are religious fanatics.
Having a religious faith is not necessary for the Retrouvaille experience. I would say that only 30% of our group was Catholic. There were many couples in which only one spouse had any religious affiliation. You and your H will not be dissappointed. RV has changed our life.
The RV week-end is not a spiritual retreat, seminar, or counseling. It's about rediscovering yourself and your spouse in a new and positive way. In a nut-shell, RV is about learning how to listen, forgive, and communicate. A breakdown in listening and communicating is what allowed my marriage to disintegrate. Eleanor, I guarantee that if you and your spouse attend with an open mind and really have a desire to repair your marriage you will not be dissappointed.
I was one of those people that would never get outside help. I would have never seen a therapist. I always assumed that me and my wife would always be together. The affairs literally shattered my world. I have never felt so broken in my entire life.
Other couples, seeking help, attend the week-end. You have opportunity to share your problems but it is not required. I found it very theraputic to be in a room with 14 other couples for three days. Listening to those that shared their troubles was a life-saver. For the first time since D-Day I did not feel alone.
Our listening and communication skills are much better. We understand our feelings and know how to better handle emotions. We are stronger people now.
Congratulations in finding Retrouvaille. Again, you will not be dissappointed. Your husband's willingness to attend is a wonderful sign.
