Hi All: I am fairly numb. WS is not home and does not yet know that OW sent me the emails he has been sending her. Of course they are disgusting and so forth. I am not hurting though. I am more disgusted and disappointed. Fool me once, shame on you, Fool me twice, shame on me. Anyway, she wants to have a conversation with me tonight. I no longer want to be married to this man. He knows how much this hurt me yet he has no sense to protect me, or even how to be my man. This lying has been going on for a year and half now. I do not believe he even knows how to stop or should I say has a desire to do so. He has lied to me every day for a year and a half. I just told someone that he was my best friend. I feel pretty foolish. I do not want to see or talk to him. Yuck. We have two kids. I feel sorry for them. This is their father. My poor babies.

Wucus,

Sounds like the WS and OW have had a big fallout and the OW is making you her personal punching bag. She is willing to divulge her dirt and give you the pain. She may be a rabbit cousin of PBR. If so, my advice is stay away.

Use the info you have and decide what you want to do. The OW is using you, pushing your buttons and if you fall for it, she will win even if it is only for a moment.

When PBR did this to me, I initially fell for it.... a few times. Then it got old along with their A and I would learn to use their fights to MY advantage. Yep you got that right. You have the option to learn to use this info to your advantage.

L.

wucus,

No LB ... 'ok. I am disagree with Orchid on this one. Print the email out and show it to WS. Not with anger or not with judgement ... just hand him and tell him "I got this". No less no more. Let him explain, bite your tounge and just listen. Don't tell him anything about what you do, when asked you tell him you need time to think about it. It is time for tough love and you have the best Venusian here to help you (Orchid).

Meanwhile don't engage OW !.

Sorry to hear this, you have worked soo hard.

-rh-

<small>[ March 29, 2003, 06:55 PM: Message edited by: redhat ]</small>

wucus,

You've got good advice from two of the best already. And I completely agree with them. No major decisions..no major blow ups. Print those emails and hand them to him. Try as hard as you can..no pleading, no crying, no ultimatums,,just listen.

And the phone call from the OW? I'd like to say,,don't take it...(she's not going to tell you anything you want to hear and you can probably believe half of what she does say)....but I know I would. Remember, she does NOT have your best interests at heart! If you do answer the phone, do NOT offer ANY info about you, your H or your relationship..or your plans,,past, present or future.

I'm so sorry you have to deal with this again. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Frown]" src="images/icons/frown.gif" />

Orchid, RedHat: You two are old friends. And I love you both. I really do not know what to do. I am not hurt really. I sort of sensed something. I like your idea RedHat. He should be ashamed of himself. I feel sorry for him really.

Orchid: You are right. They must have had a fight and she wants to hurt me. She did it before and now she wants to know what my plan is. She hopes that the emails will hurt me so that I will kick him out. Finally, give him the divorce she want so. Ha!! The bigger punishment will be to have to live with me!!!! and his own sorry self. If he wants to go he will have to do it. But he will beg me for forgiveness first. Thanks you two. wu

are you sure the emails are really from your H? email addresses can be faked. do you know how to check the headers? no offense to OP who post here, but OP are notorious for pulling some really ugly tricks.

Thank you MJ-OH: But yes I am sure they are from him. Personal stuff mentioned that OW would not know about. Plus he sent a picture of himself. He looks like a fool.lol Thanks. wu

May God bless you with calm heart and steady tounge. Let H explained, give him a benefit of doubt. If he has no remorse and getting angry ... send him tough love. If he is crawling and want to ammends ... let him think how he could make you feel secure in this relationship and put the bar higher. He has to earn it.

I hate those dumb WS ... I wish I could put a GPS system on their rear behind and drop them at OP. Dumb bomb <img border="0" title="" alt="[Razz]" src="images/icons/tongue.gif" /> .

-rh-

Red you a crazy!!!!lol, The funny thing about the emails is that he is obviously lying to her. He never called her, he kept telling her that he could not afford a phone card.