Doc:<P>I am only responding from a Biblical standpoint. I am 'calling things that are not as though they were' (Romans 4, talking about Abraham).<P>Also, the power of life and death is in the tongue (Proverbs).<P>I am speaking out by faith and not by feelings or facts!<P>Truth is greater than fact!<P>No, my wife is not dating anyone, she is overseas on the mission field. This is the main problem between us now. She seems to think ministry comes ahead of marriage and I believe God's priority is the home.<P>So, our situations are different, but the pain of separation is the same.<P>Please don't be a 'skeptic' because the Bible says (I Corinthians) that 'the natural man (or mind) receives not the things of the spirit'.<P>Yes, I am a happily married man (by faith)<BR>regardless of circumstances. I have to contend with natural feelings of hopelessness <BR>just like everyone else; however it has been well said, "it's better to hope for something and be disappointed than to hope for nothing and get nothing"<P>[censored]

doc - I can tell you I was much MUCH happier after my divorce from my 1st W. We had a good divorce process in that it was a mediated, "no-fault" divorce (we both used the same lawyer). Although I was sometimes lonely being apart from my family and home, I gradually got out of a fairly severe depression I had been in for a long time and began to heal from a lot of ailments that had come on me as a result of being in an intolerable marital situation. And I became more of a success on my own terms, really getting out into the world and doing things. In fact, I enjoyed being single so much that I was VERY reluctant to get married again and only really did so because I'm so nuts about my present W and she made it clear we couldn't live together unless and until we were married. And I was single for 8 years. If I had stayed married, I'd probably be dead by now.<P>I can tell you too, the celibacy part ain't so bad either. It's even really something of a relief not to have to freaking WORRY about sex! In fact, I would recommend what a friend of mine recommended when I was going through the divorce process. Take a vacation from intimate relationships with women. It's tempting when you're divorcing to find someone, anyone, to take the place of your spouse and (even though I did it too) I think this may be a mistake. It doesn't help all that much and just gets you involved in the whole scene all over again.<P>Hope this helps,<P>--Wex

I cheated and my husband divorced me. I so very much want to remarry my ex husband but I noticed that it seemed that all those wanting to remarrry are the ones that were cheated on and usually didn't want to divorce to begin with. Most wanting the divorce are the cheaters. Even the self-help books are for the betrayed. I'm on the other end. Any remarry after divorce?

Doc,<BR>My cousin came home from work one day and his wife said that their marriage was over, she wanted out. So, they divorced shortly thereafter and yes there was another man. Well, about six months later they found themselves at the same place and she asked him to call her and things went from there. Today they have been happily remarried for ten years and have a strong, loving bond.

Hi.<P>My h's sister and h divorced after she had an affair. <P>Six YEARS later, they ran into each other, started dating and, you guessed it! They remarried after a short (VERY short) courtship!!<P>And yes, they are very happy still.<P>Lori

I have a very good freind who I worked with who started having an affair with someone we worked with. He divorced his wife,, got engaged to ow,, after a couple of years the relationship failed.. (rocky all along). He tried to get his wife back and eventually succeeded. They re-married, had another child together and now have been together on their 2nd marriage for 9 years..(And he has been faithful).. This person is also one of the persons helping my h right now.

I just wanted to say that if the divorce does go through, it does not mean it's over. Not me myself, but I know of several marriages that has worked out after much pain and even after divorce. You see doc, I believe marriage is in the heart, not paper. However, if you decide to wait or move on, just know that we are here for you in dealing with you feelings. My husband can file for divorce in April and I'm just absolutely terrified. You are in my prayers and thoughts!<P>------------------<BR>"If you can learn from the mistakes of others, you won't have to make them youself."<P>

Doc,<BR> I have a GREAT success story in my family.<P> My SIL and BIL had one of the most incredibly ugly divorces I've ever even HEARD of!! <BR> My SIL had an affair (we never knew this) and my BIL was soooo cruel during the D hiding all his assets being cruel and left her penniless!!<BR> SIL had to move out of state to get away from his wrath!!<BR> They were divorced and didn't have contact for 1 1/2 years NONE! We (the family) HATED my BIL because of his cruelty.<BR> A year ago we heard THEY HAD REMARRIED!!! <BR> We could not believe it!!! We thought she had LOST HER MIND!!<BR> I saw my SIL last month and took a two hour walk with her. She told me EVERYTHING!! About the affair and another man after that (while divorced) And how her H and herself had found God again.<BR> Well, THEY HAVE A WONDERFUL LOVING MARRIAGE of ONE YEAR!!<BR> They celebrate BOTH their wedding anniversaries and work on their marriage constantly. They say thy have been married 20 years and one year!! It took a LOT more work than ANY of us will EVER need because we found this forum! Well that's it. It helped me too because my W was fascinated by the story asking tons of questions all the way home. GOOD LUCK & PRAYERS (you never know 11th hours wake people up too!! FRANK<P>------------------<BR>desperate<BR>"If yesterday didn't stop today, Why should TODAY stop tomorrow??" <BR>"Wisdom is why!!"<P>