Welcome to the
Marriage Builders® Discussion Forum

This is a community where people come in search of marriage related support, answers, or encouragement. Also, information about the Marriage Builders principles can be found in the books available for sale in the Marriage Builders® Bookstore.
If you would like to join our guidance forum, please read the Announcement Forum for instructions, rules, & guidelines.
The members of this community are peers and not professionals. Professional coaching is available by clicking on the link titled Coaching Center at the top of this page.
We trust that you will find the Marriage Builders® Discussion Forum to be a helpful resource for you. We look forward to your participation.
Once you have reviewed all the FAQ, tech support and announcement information, if you still have problems that are not addressed, please e-mail the administrators at mbrestored@gmail.com
Previous Thread
Next Thread
Print Thread
#1074610 05/22/03 09:49 AM
Joined: Nov 2000
Posts: 33
P
Member
OP Offline
Member
P
Joined: Nov 2000
Posts: 33
Hi everyone, Its been a long time since I have posted here. Probably 3 yrs or so. Well I am back.

I wont get into past relation ship, just new one. I have been with my women for 2 yrs now. We are not married. Just a couple or dating how ever you want to put it.

Our relationship has been kinda rough, though never had any really big fights. We have split up a few times though, mainly I was a ffraid to commit. She has been madly in love with me for the hole 2 yrs. She always showed affection, and stood by me through thick and thin.

Now, I have not always done that for her. I was affraid what happened in my marriage would happen now.

So we broke up a couple months ago. Were apart, but still talked on the phone. One day My eyes opened, I smelled the roses and Said I want to marry this girl. Well I told her that one night. She was shocked. Very shocked.

Things were good for about a month. Then I got suppicious, cause she was going out on the weekends. I did not go. I was letting her have her space. She was out at night, jet sking during the days. One day I said " I dont have anything to do, want me to come watch yall ride Jet skies?" Her reply was "no. I will be done abou 5 and call you." She called at 5. I started getting courious about who she was with. She says girls, but I think diffrent.

Here Ciomes the biggest fight of them all. one morning after we got off work. ( we work 24hr shifts. She is a paramedic, I am a Firefighter) She came to my house. I had already showered. We ususally do together. Well when she got in I went through her phone and text pager. she had been messeging this guy, With things like " I miss you". I got mad instantly. I was gonna let it go, but couldnt. I confronted her. WOW did she get mad. She left instantly.

Weh have talked since then, even hung out all day long. She and her son spent the night at my house last night, but she stayed in my bed, and I stayed on the floor next to the bed.( I wanted to be near her). During the night I asked she got on the floor too. I asked her if I could put my arm aroun her. She said yes. I did. She later got back in bed. I stayed on the floor. I dont want to make her feel pressured. She later asked me to lay in bed with her. I did and just held her for the first time in a while. I went and cut some roses and left her a good morning note. She got it, but didnt say anything about it.

She let me take her son to school this morning. I have only done that once before, but she would have been late for work if she took him.

I have been giving to her so much, I dont think she believes in me though, cause of so much of me talikng for so long. I think she is still seeing some one else. I have time to wait to see what happens. I have been praying a lot too.

She is nominated for Medic of the year for the state of TX (I think). She is gonna be awarded it tonight. She has a banquet, But said its for empliyees only, but there are tickets for her parents. Strange, bvut I have time. I want to take things slow, but it is hard.

I was just wondering if I am doing the right things to show her that I am true about wanting to be with her till I take my last breath. (fore ever)

Thanks, and sorry this is so long

#1074611 05/22/03 02:15 PM
Joined: Aug 2000
Posts: 2,457
B
Member
Offline
Member
B
Joined: Aug 2000
Posts: 2,457
I hate to say it but it really sounds like she is seeing someone else also. The fact that she is nominated for an award and has tickets for her parents but says to you it is for employess only tells you she is not being straight with you. I would call up the place and ask if the public can purchase tickets. If they say yes then you know she is lying to you and playing you at the same time.
I wish you luck.

#1074612 05/22/03 03:34 PM
Joined: Nov 2000
Posts: 33
P
Member
OP Offline
Member
P
Joined: Nov 2000
Posts: 33
I hate to hear it, but you are probably correct in this case. She told me this morning that her parents may not be able to make it. She said i would ask you to go, but you would be with people you dont know. I said who would your parents be with. She replied they would be with each other.

I dont know. I do know I wont this to work out, and are taking things one day at a time

#1074613 05/24/03 08:00 AM
Joined: Aug 2002
Posts: 1,261
K
Member
Offline
Member
K
Joined: Aug 2002
Posts: 1,261
Paul-

It sounds to me as if this girl really cared but became tired of waiting for you to "wake" up. She probably os dating someone else now because she had needs that weren't being met. I've read in many books how a guy "wakes" up as the girl is walking out the door because the pressure from her is gone - she's focused on something new and he finally is able to look at the situation because he wants to not because he has to.

I hope that made sense.

Anyway - I recommend reading this book:

How to Get your lover Back - link at amazon.com

If you really want this, you have to do some work...it's not too late, but you have to realize that it will take time, commitment, and patience.

<small>[ May 24, 2003, 08:01 AM: Message edited by: kily ]</small>

#1074614 05/29/03 12:43 AM
Joined: Aug 2002
Posts: 1,261
K
Member
Offline
Member
K
Joined: Aug 2002
Posts: 1,261
bumping- don't know if you caught my response...


Moderated by  Fordude 

Link Copied to Clipboard
Forum Search
Who's Online Now
0 members (), 336 guests, and 59 robots.
Key: Admin, Global Mod, Mod
Newest Members
AG2DMAX, Drb6317, Linda Horan, BillTages, salmawis
71,968 Registered Users
Latest Posts
Roller Coaster Ride
by still seeking - 04/30/25 02:29 PM
I didn’t have a chance
by still seeking - 04/26/25 03:32 PM
Forum Statistics
Forums67
Topics133,623
Posts2,323,495
Members71,969
Most Online3,185
Jan 27th, 2020
Building Marriages That Last A Lifetime
Copyright © 2025, Marriage Builders, Inc. All Rights Reserved.
Site Navigation
Powered by UBB.threads™ PHP Forum Software 7.7.5