I am in my second marriage, to a wonderful man. We've been married 4 years.

Every year, I pass the "anniversary" date of the day my XH cheated on me. The day he began his affair, and the day I moved out. I still notice these days, and can't help but to think about it, even tho I have been divorced 6 years from this man. When I pass the "anniversary" dates, I get all moody, and depressed, and even begin to think that my DH will do the same thing.

How long will I be thinking like this? Will the pain of these dates ever end? Will I always have the fear that my DH, who truly does love me, might cheat on me too?

thanks.

Plan ahead.

Pick one of these anniversary dates and make that day "THE" day.

Then plan some sort of ceremony for yourself. Be creative.
1. Stage a mock funeral for that marriage? Complete with eulogy?
2. Choreograph a modern dance depicting the drama of that marriage?
3. Write a poem / sonnet about that marriage, read it aloud to the trees, then burn it and bury the ashes.
4. Make a list of all the lessons that marriage taught you. Take the list and put it in your diary.
5. Plan a day of service to your community for that day.
6. Plan a day of beauty and rejuvination.

YOU OWN that day. Make it mean what you want. Who says you
"can't" .... except you?

See .... you can turn this significant past event into anything you want. You don't have to pretend to ignore it or try to forget it ... whatever you do, make it yours.

Pep <img border="0" title="" alt="[Cool]" src="images/icons/cool.gif" />

I guess I just thought that after 4 years of being married to someone else, that this wouldn't still bother me. Am I weird that it still does?

You're only weird if you want to be!!! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

Think of it like a death. You will never "forget" , but you can decide to move on and to live life according to your own desires.

Own it. Don't let it own you.

Pep <img border="0" title="" alt="[Cool]" src="images/icons/cool.gif" />