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Joined: May 2002
Posts: 101
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Joined: May 2002
Posts: 101 |
I don't understand, my WH seem to be having such a good time...I notice that he goes all out to pls the OW...I have notice him doing romantic things for her..(which he never done anything for me) I don't understand...I tried to be the best wife to him and always supported him...and what did I get.....nothing... I am now very lonely and still hurt...this is so unfair!!!!!
How do I move on.....I have tried Plan A and B and got no results...what next??
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Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 17,837
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Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 17,837 |
Dear Tatchina,
Please catch me up. How did your do your plan A & B? Your sig line mentions recovery.....is there a more recent d/d?
L.
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Joined: May 2002
Posts: 101
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Joined: May 2002
Posts: 101 |
Sorry, 05/02/02...last year..I need to update.. I tried plan A before and after he left and all he did was become worst...I then went to plan B and still got no response...One thing that happen, which I thought was a positive was that went we first separated, he moved to the other side of town, since then he has moved in an apartment complex next door to mine to be closer to the kids....so he said.....anyway he has been threating me with a divorce that he said he was doing hisself...he had called me several times asking for information, in which, I told him to find it himself....I am really getting tried and I really fill like giving up....
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Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 17,837
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Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 17,837 |
So Tatchina,
One just wonders what is taking this man soooo long to D his M. Maybe OW and the A are not that great? Yet his pride is in his way? Feels to guilty maybe!??!?!
Whatever the reason, what you wrote doesn't show where you did a good plan A or B. I don't mean to sound mean but the fact that he can't do the D by himself may be a sign that he can't let go of you yet.
Now I ask you, do you want him hanging onto your skirt or do you want a partner for life? Him moving closer is a good sign but not enough.
What do you think he has seen to make him think he is really losing his family?
L.
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Joined: May 2002
Posts: 101
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Joined: May 2002
Posts: 101 |
One of the things that I did differently this time is that I have not been bugging him about making the marriage work....I have been by the house to pick up children while he has been on the phone talking with OW and show no remorse..(even though I be mad as hell:) I also told him that I would not contest the divorce as long as terms were fair...I do not LB him at all...I have been very cool in the whole situation...you know, a part of me is so confused about what I really want because, right now I am so lonely...I have joined a gym and I work out daily and right now I am unemployed and I try to keep myself busy...I'm fine sometimes...I really have a hard time when the children are not here.....I am really trying to hang in this, but it is getting very hard...
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Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 17,837
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Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 17,837 |
Tachina
....What do you think he has seen to make him think he is really losing his family?
L.
<small>[ July 07, 2003, 02:29 AM: Message edited by: Orchid ]</small>
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Joined: May 2002
Posts: 101
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Joined: May 2002
Posts: 101 |
You know, nothing, I suppose, other than I seem not to care anymore...what do you think will make him feel that way??? I don't really think he would care...sad, huh???
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Joined: May 2002
Posts: 101
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Joined: May 2002
Posts: 101 |
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Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 17,837
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Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 17,837 |
Is he out of the home? Do you have primary custody of the children?
What is he doing to guaratee you financial security? What can you do to protect that asset?
Joining a gym is good but you also need to strengthen your inner self.
L.
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Joined: May 2002
Posts: 101
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Joined: May 2002
Posts: 101 |
yes, he has been out of the home for a year and 2 mths...also I do have prinmary custody of kids and pay child support...remember I told you he moved in the appartments next door??? I am trying to strengthen my inner self, but I still get so lonely and mad sometimes when I see him happy with someone else.. I am feel that it is so unfair for him to be happy when he was the one who messed up...!!
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Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 17,837
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Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 17,837 |
Can he move farther away or can you? There are ways to combat the loneliness. Let's see what kind of suggestions come by. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> L.
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