This is a simple question and I need some advise, so I am asking for as many opinions as I can get.
Quick summary. I am The BS, D Day was 2 and a half years ago. WW did finally come back, but no real discussion of what caused the problem (I was sandbagged by the A, had no idea). WW told me she lost desire for me because of my health problems and could not recover it, but agreed to work on it. If she did, she could have fooled me. Recovery was going OK and I was trying to do everything I could to make M work ( no pressure, tried to give her a certain level of comfort and have forgiven her). Past year SF 3 times, She never initiates, I ask about once every couple of weeks.
Now the simple question, Should I give up or hang in. WW won't even entertain counseling, acts like nothing is wrong. Seems very at ease, except when SF is brought up. Very little of any affection for her. What I need from you is a poll so to speak. Should I stay or should I go ( no kids). Resentment in me building, starting not to care what the outcome is, might just be staying because I have no family left and fear being alone. What would you do? Need answers fast, because anniversary is coming in about a month and refuse to celebrate with this hanging.

I LOVE it when someone gives a senario then asks:

"What would you do?"

I would schedule a joint counseling session for next week.

I would tell my spouse that I am very unhappy with the status quo in the M. So unhappy, in fact, that I feel I may need to leave the marriage.

I would share with my spouse that I have already booked a counseling session. I would graciously invite my spouse to join me, if he chooses to try and work on the marriage.

Then, I would ask him if he'd like me to bring him a coffee or a tea or anything else.

Then, I'd go about my business, without further discussion.

I love the way you asked this!!!!

Pep

<small>[ July 21, 2003, 03:12 PM: Message edited by: Pepperband ]</small>