WS thinks they need to have closure and let the New Soul Mate know how bad WS was hurt Should WS call or write Does this mean WS is not over New Soul Mate

Cherry,

I will make this short. Then if you have more to ask or discuss, I am available.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">WS thinks they need to have closure and let the New Soul Mate know how bad WS was hurt</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">This is called Fog.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Should WS call or write</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">No. Look at the book on Surviving an Affair on how to write a No Contact letter. There is NO REASON for the WS to make any info about their feelings known to the OP if they are truly leaving the affair.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Does this mean WS is not over New Soul Mate </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Yes. But most WSs arent over the OP when they decide to leave. At least not completely. So, the deal that the WS must understand that nothing good will come from letting the OP know their feelings. Only the possibility of being drawn back in.

In His arms.

<small>[ August 19, 2003, 08:39 PM: Message edited by: Mortarman ]</small>

Even though WS has moved back in for almost a year attending church, Sunday School and wants us to make it work. Should I question WS on his reasoning for contact of Soul Mate? WS found out that Soul Mate only wanted him for money support and that really hurt him. Wants to let SOul Mate know how back it hurt for closure Says has not had contact for almost a year

Should I question WS on why need to contact for closure? We have been back together for almost a year and WS says there has been no contact. Has committed to me. Affair ended finding out New Soul Mate only needed money. That was the hurt I guess WS ruinned a great marriage and WS is angry at New Soul Mate or maybe at himself?

Okay why do you call the other person his soulmate?

Just curious because if your spouse really thought OP was his soulmate then what happened?

Did she decide to remain in her marriage?

I would be concerned about contact for a number of reasons.

First of all it keeps the OP alive not only in his mind but in yours as well.

Secondly it implies that the OP is of any significance....which they should not be if he is truly committed to keeping his marriage.

Finally I would be worried about the relationship starting anew if he is still hurt by the breakup when after one year he should be glad his mistake and poor choice is over and in the past.

Stunned Dad

That is what I am afraid of WS says he loves me not lover lover used WS for money WS says anger/hurt at lover for running WS life I think WS is anger/hurt by self Comment?