Hello everybody,
I've been in plan b since August 9th. I found out yesterday wife has called my boss (who is also a really good friend of mine) on two occasions. WS asked how i was doing and she told my boss she missed me but was respecting my wish of NC. My boss asked her if A was ongoing and she said yes. I suspected this already. WS told my boss she was madly in love with OM. The problem is OM has a fiance and two kids. Everytime they're together OM Fiance calls him and he goes running home. This really pisses my wife off she feels she's second choice to OM even though he tells her he doesn't love his fiance. Here's where it gets weird. My wife told my boss she feels like she wants to kill OM fiance or get pregnant by OM so they can be together all the time. my boss says it sounds like OM is having his cake and eating to. My boss said it sounded as if my wife is really lonely and is reaching out for help. I feel sorry for my wife but also think she's stupid for thinking this way. My boss thinks the affair will end soon. she thinks OM has no intention of leaving his fiance and kids. My boss says give it some time for A to fizzle out. I don't think it will because ws and om work together and ws is very dependent. ws family doesn't really care about what she's doing and she has no friends. In the meantime i did some investigation and got solid proof ( motel receipt with om info) that the A has been ongoing. The first time i exposed the A to OM fiance she didn't believe me now that i have solid proof i think she would. My plan is to call OM tell him the info i have and tell him to end A completly no contact or anything or i will share info with his fiance. My boss says not to because this will push my WS farther away. what do you think? let the affair fizzle out on it's own or expose it to OM Fiance for a second time. It's frustrating i feel like resorting to street justice. any advise would be helpful.

Tell the OM's fiance. It's part of getting the affair out in the open. But be polite and keep it short.

Since you've N/C your wife she's now trying to get to you through your boss. I'd tell your boss/friend that the next time she calls to ask her not to call him again. N/C meens N/C

goodguy007,
thanks for the quick response. I think if i tell the fiance all hell will break loose. from talking to OM fiance before i get the feeling she's not stable. i don't want anything to happen to my ws. i figure if i tell other man first and give him the chance to end the A without telling my ws of my involvement my ws won't hate me. also when my wife called my boss she told her not to tell me she called.

Tell Fiance, do not warn OM. As long as the secret lives, he can always reenter your life. If you tell Fiance, the OM will be so busy dealing with her he will not have time for your WS.

<small>[ August 27, 2003, 03:00 PM: Message edited by: hubby ]</small>

Jerry Springer may want to speak to your W and her OM and OM's fiance and her kids.

sheesh! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" />

stay as far away from this as possible .... there will be more ugliness, and soon. Keep your hands clean of blame.

Pep <img border="0" title="" alt="[Cool]" src="images/icons/cool.gif" />

I understand that you love her but you need to look at the fact that if she can do this after 3 months of marriage what kind of a future are you going to have with her even if she comes back.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by tomaz:
<strong>I understand that you love her but you need to look at the fact that if she can do this after 3 months of marriage what kind of a future are you going to have with her even if she comes back.</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Wow, I have to agree with tomaz. Can you imagine how much worse it would be with 3 little kids? For Gods sake, run for your life! This was a bad match.