Hope I'm posting in the right section. I've been reading all the stories, questions and comments in the Infidelity section for months now. I've learned so much, but in many ways feel that I've done the wrong thing by staying with my WH. I know, deep inside of me that it's the best thing to do, but I do still have nagging doubts. One thing that I've learned from reading these stories is that when a spouse tells you they aren't happy or need time alone, it ALMOST ALWAYS means "I'm having an affair". That seems to be a common thread in what I've read. Then, it seems MOST spouses do the same thing.........."I'm sorry, it'll never happen again, I never wanted to hurt you, our family means everything to me, I was confused" etc., etc. Yep, my WH said all those same things to me. At the time, I believed him and still do, but it seems to not mean as much to me when I read that the majority of spouses say this.
Should I feel lucky that my WH has only had purely sexual encounters, as opposed to being "seriously involved" with these women? After all, he's ONLY a sexual addict. I should feel lucky, right? I've had people tell me that. It's been almost 2 yrs. since I found out about his first A......after that 5 more came to light. We've been up, down & around. Went to MC for over a year, worked hard to rebuild, & continue to work hard. In the long run, though, I'm the one who has been given a problem and I'm the one that has to make this fit into my everyday life. Sometimes I want to be a baby and yell, "this is not fair". It's not fair, but it's life. I go from loving my H so much to disliking him intensely! Crazy, but true. It occurs to me that my story is unique because it's mine, but at the same time, it's really not much different from everybody elses. I hate being a statistic!
Forgive all of my ramblings today. They're just random thoughts, put in no particular order. I just felt like I needed to vent. Some days are just better than others.
